Sebastian Bach Imagines

I Remember You

*not a song fic.

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The last time I saw Sebastian, he had just announced his engagement to Maria. And after faking excitement and joy, I left the celebration with a broken heart and a painful secret.

I had hoped my subtle avoidance of the couple would go unnoticed by Sebastian, however, his phone calls filled my voicemail box every night. Most of them drunken messages left with anger-riddled insults, sharp jives, and hungover apologies.

I listened every night as his voice droned on about how much he hated me for not being by his side, for not being happy for him, for not coming around anymore. And every morning, I listened as he apologised frantically for his drunken words.

Numbly, I sat and listened. After months of the verbal assault, my mind no longer processed his words. I heard his angry voice, but I couldn't tell you what he said.

His rage put me to sleep, and his guilt forced me to move my feet in the morning.

It was toxic, but it was my life.

And then, one night as I laid in bed, restless as I had been the past few months, a horribly sharp pain stilled my swirling thoughts. Following the sharp pain was a sudden relieved pressure and a wet spot forming in my bed.

Instantly, I drove my pained body into action, dialling my parents and grabbing my hospital bag.

Within seven hours, I was laid in the hospital, cradling my newborn daughter in my arms. My parents flanked my bedside, cooing at the small human in my arms.

Carefully, I transferred the babe into my father's arms, my mother lowering herself onto the bed.

"So, does he know that you're here?" She asked, causing me to sigh. Emotional, exhausted, and numb, I began to cry.

After being numb for so long, I couldn't hold it inside any longer. I was so, so tired of bottling up everything I was feeling. My mother, ever the steady shoulder, soothed me into a dreamless sleep.

A week later, I found myself and my daughter leaving the hospital and on our way home. My father, mindful of the sleeping infant, drove carefully, but swiftly to my small home.

When we arrived, my father unloaded the car as I entered my house. I stepped in and looked around. It was exactly as I had left it. Empty. Void of feeling. Reflective of my inner turmoil.

I sighed and walked into the nursery to put the baby down.

Suddenly, Sebastian's angry voice filled the hollow home, causing the sleepy infant to start fussing. I picked her up from the crib, rocking her gently.

"I can see that he's blissfully unaware of your current situation," Mother said, entering the nursery with a sigh. Finally managing to hush the baby, I laid her gently in her crib.

"Blissful is not the word I would use, but yes. He is unaware."

"Dear, I believe I have been too...oh, fuck it. I'm going to tell you exactly what I think, and you can't get mad. You need to tell Sebastian. Everything. Tell him about the baby, your feelings; tell him everything. He needs to know. Otherwise, he'll continue to hold resentment toward you. You do want your child to grow up with a father don't you?" I nodded, "You need to tell him. Today, tonight, I don't care. He needs to know."

She was right. I needed to face reality and tell Sebastian. There was one thing, however, that bothered me.

"What if he doesn't believe me, or what if he just wants me out of his life?" I asked. Mom shook her head, letting out a small chuckle.