Ace and I parted ways due to the fact that we don't have third period together. I had music while she had math. Good, I can get some time away from the perky chick. Okay, that sounded a little bit more blunt than I wanted it to... eh, oh well.
Music is actually one of my favorite subjects, if you haven't figured that out by now. It expresses my emotions more than anything. It tells my story. It's what feelings sound like. Music exists to speak the words we can't express. Music helps me escape the reality I live in.
Trying to squeeze through the crowds of these people is aggravating. All they do is stand around talking to their stupid friends, with their stupid faces, and stupid happiness, stupid laughs and stupid lives. Ugh! They're just so, you know... stupid!
They're just always in the way, it's so annoying. Everything these peasants do is annoying. The way they giggle, cough, walk, talk, blink, even the fact they breathe is annoying. I just wanna throw a spoon at their foreheads and leave a giant red print.
Does that make me a bad person?
Actually, don't answer that.
As I made my way past everyone I kept getting disgusted faces from all these girls. They all looked the same. Mini pencil skirts, crop tops, high heels, bags that couldn't carry anything more than one book and faces caked in unnecessary makeup. Oh yeah, and they're all whores. I just rolled my eyes at them all.
I walked through the door of my music class and put my head down trying to avoid the stares from more people. I sat down in the back of the classroom while I waited for the rest of the people to enter.
Our teacher Mrs. Thomson sat at her desk going through papers. I like Mrs. Thomson because she actually likes me. She treats me like I'm normal unlike everybody else. She calls me by my name when they call me things like emo freak, bitch, a nobody, pathetic, even slut. But what I don't understand how in hell I'm a slut. I'm still a fucking virgin!! And I've only had like I don't... one boyfriend.
These bitch's logic makes no sense whatsoever.
And they really have the nerve to call me the slut. Like look at the way they dress. They each get a new guy literally every week and have already done the nasty with them on the first night. Ugh! I just don't understa-
"Jess?" My thoughts were interrupted by Mrs. Thomson. I looked up at her to see that she was now just a few seats away from me. "Are you okay?" She asked.
"Erm, yeah I'm fine. Just thinking." I sighed, fiddling with my nails. Oh, I hope she doesn't go all therapist on me again. I don't need that right now.
"You don't look fine. Tell me what's up." She said while placing her hand over both of mine. And of course she would do this to me. At the end of these I always either end up running out of here or crying.
I knew she wouldn't let this go until I started talking so I gave in and sighed. "I just... I'm just tired of everyone treating me like I'm some kind of disease. Always act like I'll kill them if they so much as even touch me or talk to me. And it hurts to know that every single damn person is ashamed of me. I don't have any friends to have my back or to help me through any of this. People that hardly even know me hate me. My own flesh and blood hates me! I don't have my mom's side here with me because she's fucking gone. A-and I just miss her so bad." By now my hands were shaking and my voice was all raspy. My eyes were watering as well.
I glanced up at Mrs Thomson was getting teary eyed too. Her thumb making little patterns on my back hand. She nodded at me to continue so I did. "And then there's my dad. Oh God, my dad. I swear he hates me more than anything. I don't even wanna talk about him." I said, wiping the tears off my face. Mrs. Thomson was trying to blink hers away.
"It's okay. Let it out." She said in a shaking voice.
"I sometimes imagine what it's like to be treated like a normal person." I half way chuckled because really, it sounds pathetic. "I just want everything to be different you know? I just know that it won't be. Ever." I wiped my tears yet again and turned to Mrs Thomson. Trying to get my breathing under control again.
"Oh Jess. I can't promise you anything, but I can hope for you. I hope it does get better for you. No one deserves to be treated this way. Especially you. You've made it so far on this journey of yours. You know why? Because you're strong. You're strong enough to continue it. All journeys have bad parts and then they have the amazing parts. Live for your amazing part, Jess. It'll come to you." Her voice was so peaceful. It was like she was a mother singing a lullaby to her infant. It was calm and almost enough to believe what she was saying. But I didn't. It wasn't gonna get better for me. I'm not gonna have my amazing experience on this journey because I'm not even sure I will make it that far.
I had to get out of here. I just couldn't handle anymore. So I stood up out of my chair and looked down at Mrs. Thomson, "Thank you so much but I have to go." I said in a low voice. She just nodded because she understood why I had to go. I grabbed my backpack and ran out. Seeing a lot of the people in the classroom had already started without the teacher. I ran down the hall until I ran into someone.
Well shit. This shall be the death of me....
(A/N) Hello lovelies! So this is chapter three. Did you like it? Vote and/or comment! Sorry for mistakes and shit... time for chapter four!!!
Kai biieeeee!!!! ✌
