Peter Parker Oneshots

Intern one meet intern two p2

Ships II Peter/Harley

Warnings II Blood/stabbing

~10 days later~

"Tonyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy Dum E just spilt acid on the floor!"

"Just pretend he didn't!"

"So I should pretend it isn't eating through my sneaker either?"

"Yes - wAiT nO!"

"So then what do I do?"

His question was answered by Tony running through the room and mopping it up with a cloth.

"I have to warn you, my intern will be back today and with him he brings chaos, so be prepared -"

"It's all good Tony!" Harley put his hands in the air in a motion of surrender, "I got this."

Besides, he thought, how bad could one smart old man be?

"And I have a press conference in 20 so if he shows up during that time just be nice and don't mention llama's or memes, or vines for that matter -"

"Why?"

"They trigger him."

What a boomer.

"Ok, old man! Have fun at your press conference!" He ushered Tony toward the door hurriedly.

"OH and no going in the lab while I'm gon -" Tony was cut off by the door shutting, leaving Harley alone in the lab, with Dum E holding a gourd bubbling with something acidic.

They stared at each other in complete silence for a second, as Harley realized that Tony's consistent sarcasm had been the only thing stopping him from thinking about his family. And then Dum E's vessel boiled over and acid spilt all over the floor.

"I should probably clean this up, huh?"

Dum E didn't reply.

Of course, he was a robot.

After sloppily cleaning up the acid, and shutting Dum E in an abandoned room where he could do no more trouble and make no more acid, Harley plopped on the couch and turned the news on, some Yadda-Yadda about Spiderman again.

The footage was just zooming in on an abandoned house when one of the windows smashed open and a boy around his age flopped on the floor from the sky.

"Guess who just got stabbed?" announced the boy, as if it were an extreme achievement.

"Who are you?" Asked Harley in confusion.

"You . . . aren't Mr Stark." The boy summed up.

"Do I look like a 40 year old who wears a suit of armour?"

"I mean you could be, for all I know," said the newcomer, which was when Harley realized the boy was face down on the floor with blood pooling around him.

"Wait, you actually got stabbed?"

"Yes, Sherlock, I said as much. Can you like, pass me the sewing kit and help me up. Avoid the arm please, I think I broke it."

Stunned and unsure, Harley moved robotically and guided the boy to the bathroom and left him in peace as the news blared away in the living room. What was going on? Should he alert Tony?

He was going to alert Tony.

He was just reaching for his phone as the toilet door opened and the boy entered with the great and original one-liner of; "so who are you?"

"I live here," Harley deadpanned. "How about you?"

"I do too, normally. It's funny, I haven't seen you around." The boy's back was to him, and he stacked the supplies where they normally sat. "My name is Peter."

"Harley."

The boy - Peter - turned to face him and gave him the shock of a lifetime. Cuteness overload. Harley.exe has stopped working.

He was a curly eyed brunette, with doe eyes and a dorky science pun T-Shirt. Harley's brain couldn't comprehend the insane amount of cuteness stuffed into one person.

"Sooooooooo," Peter ventured, "you knew around here or have I just not met you before?"

"New."

"Coolio. I'm just going to grab some stuff from my room - then we could chat?"

"Sure."

He followed Peter like a lost dog, and a second before he opened his door he recognised it as the one DUm E was in. "Don't open that -"

But it was too late.

Out spilled Dum E and a flood of white sticky webish patterned looking gunk flowed into the corridor.

"mY rOoM!"

"That may or may not have been my fault -"