I am Aspergic

Support at School

Support in school

I have a support teacher who guides me to say the right things to people and to keep me organised. If I say something inappropriate to a teacher, she will explain Aspergers to them because Aspergers is a relatively new discovery and not very well known (the point of this book!). There have sometimes been misunderstandings between teachers that have caused big reactions on my part, such as when a drama teacher was very strongly saying that my ideas were wrong. I had this idea that he had so pome kind of agenda against me and just gave up. My support teacher could clearly see my waning interest (Drama is a very good subject of mine) and went to discuss the issue with the drama teacher. It turns out he did not realise it was the way he was saying things that upset me such as the tone and volume of his voice, and I now consider him a really nice teacher now that his methods of describing issues and how he speaks to me has improved, thanks to the careful work of the Learning support team, and I look forward to doing Drama under his teaching for A levels.

I have learned to be 'less aspie' in school, and avoid shouting out answers, when people get them wrong. Just a side note: his was very prominent when I was younger, as I would read and read and read, especially A level textbooks at twelve. I have also reduced how often I go around saying certain things without realising their consequences, but every so often I will slip up and I will not understand what an earth I did wrong. This can be a big issue for me, and I will not be able to accept that I am wrong, and I do not forget incidents. I used to get so frustrated the apparent injustice, and I used to have a thing called a hate list. This was probably when I was about 13 years old. The hate list was, as it suggests, a list of people who had really peeved me off. It is actually quite an aspie trait in making lists as it has a sense of order and structure, which an aspie likes.

This list had actually become quite notorious, and the teachers would know if they were on it, and some would say, having spoken to me about an incident, "I know I'm probably going to end up on your hate list for this...” In the end the list accumulated probably about 20 teachers. I held these grudges for years and in some cases, still do. One teacher actually misunderstood what I said and turned it into a major incident, where she was alarmed and thought I was reading her mind. This was when I was obsessed with psychology, and a small incident around it happened. In the lower school office being talked to about it, I felt the teacher was testing my ability when she said I couldn't hypnotise or suggest mental ideas to people, so I told her not to think of a black cat. Well the next thing that happened is she went quiet for about 5 or 10 seconds, as she clearly had the idea stuck in her mind. I was just demonstrating a harmless point, but she didn't react positively. Indeed the teacher did apologise, after blanking her for 6 months and she clearly knew she was on m hate list. But this kind of thing was extremely common when I was a lot younger. My support teacher has always been able to resolve issue for me, should there be any.

My support teacher continues to be a huge aid for my organisation. Before she came along, my English file was a pile of mismatched sheets strewn within a ring binder, but now it is much more organised. Luckily I don't do English anymore, as I really didn't understand it. My support teacher really had to whip me into shape in that lesson, because I didn't understand anything, and the teacher didn't understand that I didn't understand. I felt it was almost patronisation and so I completely blocked any information that was dispensed. The support teachers always made sure however that the information got into my head somehow. In my old school I had different amount of support and I forgot books all the time and relied on memory to remember homework. Every lesson I would say 'can I get my book?' But now, my support teacher checks my diary to make sure I have everything I need to know written down, concisely and very details so I do not have any organisation issues. In my old school, I had a very lovely, sweet support teacher who made a keychain for every day of the week with the lessons that I could consult for which books to get before lessons. Before, I was flying blind essentially. Hey I'm getting pretty good at these phrases.

My current support teacher sometimes comes to lessons to make sure I'm ok and understand homework and that I am concentrating. To help me concentrate, she gives me paper to doodle on, which apparently helps. I generally like to draw my obsessions, however, and my obsessions seems to divert all my attention away from the work at hand, so it actually becomes detrimental to progression. Oops. Sometimes I may lapse into a state of kind where I only draw my obsessions for every lesson, and I learn nothing all day. You can't win! My support teacher helps me in even more ways that this. I have massive anxiety over queuing, and people keep touching me and making loud noises. It can cause me to go into sensory overload, so I get to go to the front of the queue. This applies to lunch times where it is quite compact for space, meaning more people touching me. This is the same sort of when I go it theme parks, where there may be hundred of people talking, shouting and touching me. I have a medical file which my family brings, allowing me to avoid the noise, so I don't have anxiety attacks. Once I go into this state, it is horrifying, and very difficult to come out of. I would have to get away as soon as possible.