Put your lips on my scars and teach me to love • SeKen

Sejun: Cigarette

T/W: CIGARETTE USE.

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Bente, bakit?

Bente, bakit?

Bente, bakit?

It plays in his mind like a broken record player. Sejun feels lost and in a staggering state of disbelief. That guy, the dancer, is his soulmate and said guy doesn't even know it yet.

What did he say to him again? Oh, right.

Hakdog.

Sejun understands why his soulmark is the way it is. First introductions are important and the way he butted in, in Josh and the dancer's conversation was quite rude.

He thought that the guy would have a sense of humor and laugh at his joke, but turns out that's not the case. He thinks it makes sense now why his soulmate would react that way.

Ah, he really did fuck up, didn't he?

Sejun groans at his predicament, pacing in the locker room and running his fingers through his hair. He's been cooped up alone in the room for half an hour already, shooing Stell and Justin away. Josh hasn't come to check on him yet, probably still with the dancer for his audition like a temporary handler.

Eh gago ka pala eh!

Sejun hisses at that. The dancer's voice now etched into his mind. So it wasn't just the way he danced. Stell and Justin had been mesmerized by how good a dancer he was and Sejun agrees that he is, but the moment he started dancing, Sejun's soul woke up to yearning.

As if on instinct, his soul recognized its other half.

Watching the dancer practice, Sejun had felt seduced and strangely, he had felt like he was almost home. He had wanted to come closer, watch and hear better but Stell and Justin's constant praises had been keeping him from delving into the urge. So he had stood from afar, had carefully kept his face indifferent because he feared he had been looking at the dancer like some kind of pervert.

The dancer sang well too. His deep voice like an old song in Sejun's memory. He knew that voice. More specifically, his soul knew that voice. And it had been akin to being sung a lullaby.

Well, up until the end where the dancer's voice cracked and Sejun's OCD reared its ugly head.

He couldn't help the offended look that painted his face at the mistake and he's sure that the dancer, on instinct, sought his reaction and lost his confidence upon seeing his face. Sejun felt sorry. Still feels sorry for his constipated expression and it's burning him from the inside along with the feeling of guilt.

Who in the world would aggravate their own soulmate?

Apparently, Sejun did, and he feels horrible for it.

He's stuck in this dilemma until the dancer's 21st birthday and he recognizes the word that would mark him for life. Hakdog. Sejun hopes that his soulmate would forgive him for the stupid first word that he would have to carry on his skin, because he as sure as shit has already forgiven the dancer for the words on his wrist.

It's his own fault after all.

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The locker room proved to be suffocating for him, because standing in the back alley of their company building; Sejun keeps running his free hand through his hair while the other holds a cigarette.

He knows it's bad for his throat but he can't help it. His anxiety with this soulmate thing has him on edge and feeling pathetic. He rarely ever smokes, it was just a crutch he developed in college when thesis group members grated on his patience with their uncooperative tendencies. He quit it altogether after graduating.

But now the situation calls for a hit, the smoke curling around his wrist with the soulmark, mocking him of his fate.

Without reading the words on his skin, he can see it clear as day in his mind, accompanied with the dancer's voice now that the words had been said to his face.

Sejun wonders when the dancer's birthday would be. When he'll see that single stupid word branded on his skin. When he would realize just who his soulmate is and what he had said in turn.

It's disastrous. Something embarrassing when people would ask how they met their soulmates. How do you even tell people that your bond was doomed from the beginning?

Sejun growls low in his throat at the thought. He takes another hit of his cigarette, refusing to exhale the smoke so it could burn, burn, burn.

"Lead vocal ka diba? Lakas ng loob mong mag yosi ah."

Sejun jumps at that. He chokes on the smoke, bringing tears to his eyes as he coughs. He throws away the cigarette, stomping on it and grinding it with the heel of his boot.

"Pake mo ba?" Sejun sneers, turning to face the one person he doesn't want to see at the moment.

They say that once you meet your soulmate, you'll never get to live a day not wanting to see them again. It seems that he's the exception to that because soulmate or not, the dancer's face is such a pretty thing and it sparks something ugly in Sejun.

"Sejun, diba?" The dancer asks and Sejun watches him approach, stopping a few feet away from him.

"Oo."

"Ken," the dancer reveals and Sejun greedily accepts the name despite the animosity between them.

"Oh, ano gusto mo gawin? Suntukan? Gagohan? Nag sorry na ko," Sejun spites. "Ulitin ko pa ba?"

Ken frowns at him.

"Pasok ako. Share ko lang baka kasi bukas pag pasok ko sa practice angasan mo nanaman ako," Ken tells him rather indifferently but Sejun senses the warning in his tone.

He feels like he wants to take back the apology he said a while earlier. This soulmate of his is unapologetic. He's the one who cursed him in the first place, now he has the audacity to tell him off?

Edi sige, Sejun thinks. Pag lumabas yung hakdog sa balat mo at hinanap mo ako, tatanggihan kita. Angas pala hanap mo. Sige.

Sejun glares at Ken, walking past him and bumping shoulders. He expected Ken to get riled up with the action but Ken lets him through without a fuss.

Pocketing his fists, the leader storms back into the studio. Trying valiantly to stop thinking about Ken and his stupid handsome face.

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A/N: So I thought smoking Sejun is hot, but please don't abuse smoking, especially if you have weak lungs and throat. Lalo na kung boses and puhunan. And Sejun does NOT smoke by the way (from what I assume and know).

Next update on saturday! Thank you for reading! Please tell me what you think? :)