The Huntsman

Chapter 8 - Confession Time

A Week Later

The sunlight had faded and only the dim burning glow of the fire in the fireplace lit the room. The cave was actually chilling off a bit, but I was warm. My cheek pressed into the curly chest hairs of my man, even as my thigh lay sprawled across him. One of his hands held me by resting on the small of my back while the other one played.

It stroked down my side. Stopped to stroke my breast that was spilled out in compression against his chest. It slipped on down the road to stroke my hip only to rise back up to my face.

I closed my eyes as his fingers massaged behind my ear and then into my scalp and across my head. What he was doing felt wonderful and if I could have purred, I would have.

I nuzzled my face into him contentedly and lay there relishing his touch. The feeling of his touch was a constant echo of the fact that he found me beautiful. His shaft rose to full erection against my thigh and I lifted my head and chuckled richly.

In the dim light I could see him smile only to hear him say, "I know, I know, you're still too sore."

I was, but I didn't want to be. "I'm sorry." I said softly.

He lifted his hands and brought my head down and kissed me. It was a short kiss and then he was moving on and off the bed and throwing more wood on the fire. I stretched and lay luxuriously upon the bed.

He came back and got on the bed and pulled the covers up and I snuggled into him all over again. Eventually I turned and spooned back against him. He was still hard and his erection pressed wetly against my bottom.

He growled against my ear, "You little temptress are you trying to make me overrule my good sense?"

I laughed, but stayed where I was even as his hands came around me and my breasts were palmed by his big hands. My eyes closed as my chaffed nipples rubbed into the calluses on his hands. It hurt good.

Whispering I said, "All my life I've wanted to lie like this with my husband on a cold dark night and just be held by him. You're a dream come true for me."

He didn't say anything, but I felt him thinking. Eventually he spoke and it was with reluctance, "I'm not a good man. I've done things. Bad things. If you knew them you wouldn't want me holding you right now."

I shook my head softly and said, "That's not true Wyatt. You wouldn't have just told me what you did if you thought it would push me away. The truth is you want to justify yourself as a bad person and have me agree to it so you can convict yourself of the guilt you feel for whatever it is that you've done. I'm not going to do that. You're a good man Wyatt. You've been more than good to me and well, I've come to, in a very short time, love a lot of things about you. You're not going to scare me off."

He was silent for a long moment before finally saying, "You are quite a woman Princess."

Softly I said, "I'll listen if you want to talk."

Then perhaps in the most emotional tone that I'd ever heard from this man to date, he said, "I don't want you to know about me and what I've done! What I am!"

"You asked me to never lie to you Wyatt and with God's help I never will, but I can only get as close to your heart as you let me. I'm not going anywhere. You're my man. I won't respect you any less, because my respect for use is based out of what you are now."

"I don't deserve that kind of open grace from you!"

"Neither did I. I almost murdered someone once, Wyatt...... my sister." I managed to get out at the last as my voice became choked off with emotion.

He became very still and it was clear that he was listening to see if I would continue. I had never told anyone what I was about to before, but it was high time that I did.

"We were very different. Despite how I look now I looked very different back then. She always got the best of everything, whether it was clothes, a car, boyfriends, you name it. I was jealous of her. Most of all I was jealous of how it seemed my mom and dad loved her more than me. That inner bitterness grew and grew in me until one day I was at a gardening seminar that was being hosted in the library I worked in as an assistant. It was on house plants and always being interested in knowledge of one variety or another I sat and listened. One topic of the conversation was in regards to plants to be cautious of due to them being highly poisonous. One of the flowers they mentioned my mother happened to have a lot of at the time. I planned and debated about what to do for three days after the lecture. Finally, I did it. I squeezed the juice out of enough plants to get an amount that would've knocked an elephant off its feet. I had a plan. She always went for jogs at the track on Saturday mornings, but before she went she would drink down a glass of orange juice. I spiked her glass full of the stuff counting on the orange juice to cover the taste. Minutes later she would be in her car driving and when she crashed, I thought people would just assume it was from the crash and not bother to do an autopsy." I stopped talking as old emotion rose up in me.

Wyatt held me tighter and softly asked, "You stopped her from drinking the poison?"

On a sob I breathed out, "No."

I cried for a while and he only held me tighter. Still crying I said, "I left the room as she started to drink. I didn't do anything to stop her!"

"What happened?"

"My little brother came bounding into the house just then and he bumped into my sister and she spilled the whole glass of orange juice across the kitchen floor. They were soon laughing as they cleaned up the mess, but I was in my room crying. I couldn't believe what I'd just done! It's only by the grace of God, she didn't die that day! It was there and then that I got serious and started pursuing God. He helped me become a better person, actually a completely different person. I let go of the bitterness and jealousy I had toward my sister, but the hardest thing of all and what took the most time to do was to forgive myself for what I had done. Wyatt Richards, I tell you right now that if God can forgive me for what I did then He can forgive anything you've done too!"

I lay there crying all the while feeling comfort radiate throughout me by his holding clasp about me that had cherishment written all over it. It was good to finally share the greatest tragedy of self willed choice that I had enacted in my life.

I'd been right with God for a long time, but it felt good to be open about it at long last with someone. My worst day and moment in life was finally serving some good as it served as an example of just how forgiving God could be.

I'd settled down some when I felt him nuzzle his lips against my ear and say, "Thank you for telling me that. In a way all you've done is make me love you even more than I've already come to do."

"Ohhh!" I exclaimed, and wheeled around in his arms.

"Do you really mean that? You love me?"

"I do." He said affirmatively and I attacked him. My lips were all over his and I acted the aggressor and speared my tongue into his mouth. His shaft had become soft as we had talked, but that wasn't the case now. Grabbing a hold of his hips I pulled him over on top of me only to pull him closer as my thighs and calves wrapped around him.

"Tamara......" He started to say, but I cut him off and passionately said, "Shut up honey and take me! The only pain I don't want right now is the absence of not having you in me as deep as you can be!"

He slid into me and with a groan I pulled him further still with my legs even as I kissed him with all I had. Crying I made love to this man, still in some ways a stranger, and yet more intimately aware of me and what I was about than anyone else ever had been.

I came suddenly and screamed his name in my passion, even as my fingernails sank into his back deeply. God was so good!

He'd saved me, redeemed me, kept me, set me free, and now He'd given me a love I'd never expected, but never wanted to do without.