Warning:before y'all read, this has swearing so if u don't like swearing than u can just ignore this I guess
So lately I haven't been doing good I know yall wanna read this book and see a progress but I can't anymore I'm tired
I'm tired because Im not perfect because I've made mistakes I'm tired of not making enough friends that believe in me to know that people talk behind my back
I want someone to love I want someone who can appreciate me to tell me I'm worth so much more than a simple thing
Yesterday I played games with a few friends and I was happy for once in my life u might be thinking how I'm happy playing games with friends it's because they were there for me they asked if I was okay
My friend who I used to like even talked to me told me what was happening
I hate this world why? Because in there eyes they think we're perfect but we're not I even talked to my friend going on a rant about how people who talk behind their back are the reason why bad things happened aswell as I was dumb to fall in love with someone I knew for a fact that they probably only like my body because when we broke up he said "your always acting like a bitch" how? HOW?! SHOULD I FUCKING ACT WHEN I NEVER DATED ANYONE BEFORE U EXPECT ME TO BE PERFECT TO BE SOMEONE U CAN LOVE WHEN I DONT KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT LOVE ABOUT BEING APPRECIATED!
We were changed to be someone else when we we're mentally asking and crying for help
I was hurt I was broke for a short time I'm life and yet I'm still here crying because I finnaly know what it means to say "I love u" I may not know much but I'm 15 u can't expect someone to tell u what love is
people date find out they are not the right person for them
We all expect the best in people
I've tried so hard to keep myself together I felt like I was trapped in tape I couldn't move I was always uncomfortable I couldn't just say "oh I have issues" I can't because Everytime I say something they talk about with someone I have trust issues
Have u ever told yourself why that person was always happy why she always smiled it was because she was hurt
She knew for a fact that one day her friends would leave me
And I think that's the best thing that has ever come in life
Leaving....
So I feel as though the only way to leave is to just confront my friends
Tell me why the hell my friend who met this year cared for me was there for me as I am with her 💔 it breaks my heart to know I can't be there for people cause I can't help pick up pieces
My friends been heartbroken but what about me you've told people to not date me because I'm "crazy" atleast I'm not fake atleast I'm fucking there for people to tell them things
And then all of a sudden they take it for granted
Just know that people who are always happy have issues too they just keep it hidden because they know they would be left there watching people talk to each other and she will only be known as a memory
