pretty girl | sope

{ five }

{ now playing : heather, conan gray }

yoongi smiled to himself secretly, tomorrow he would be going suit shopping with hoseok.

alright, so maybe he was a little too excited for this. but he really liked hanging out with hoseok, it was when he smiled the most.

it's cheesy. but he felt the happiest around him. he could only hope hoseok felt the same way.

hoseok figured out how to slightly switch up his schedule, so on some days, he would randomly come up to yoongi at his tree and eat with him, and other days, yoongi would remain alone.

yoongi didn't like having a schedule, because that meant yoongi always had something to look forward to when he heard the lunch bell ring. his heart would get all jumpy and his stomach would do flips as he sat against his tree. it was a 50/50 chance he would end up eating with hoseok, which is why he hated getting his hopes high, then facing the crushing disappointment.

but on the times hoseok did show up, yoongi's cheeks would flame and his lips would quirk into a cheesy smile.

and all the anticipation was worth it.

hoseok always made yoongi's emotions ride on a seesaw.

yoongi sat against the tree, not going through with his promise to hoseok to eat during lunch, even when he wasn't hanging out with hoseok. but today especially, yoongi wasn't anticipating for hoseok to come eat with him, since he had spent his lunch with yoongi the day before, and hoseok didn't usually come to eat with him two days in a row.

so when yoongi felt the familiar feeling of a bag of chips thrown at his shoulder, his eyes flew open and his heart jumped in his chest.

"h-hoseok?"

hoseok raised his eyebrows, "why're you so surprised for?"

"nothing," yoongi exhaled, shaking his head slightly with a small smile. he took the chips in his hands and opened them. "thanks, by the way." he nodded at hoseok, popping a chip into his mouth.

"you're a liar, min yoongi." hoseok sighed, flopping down next to him as he leaned back against the tree bark. "i know you don't eat on the days i don't sit with you." hoseok grumbled with a pout, munching on his own chips.

"you don't know that."

"well?" hoseok turned toward him, "do you?"

yoongi cleared his throat. "y-yeah." you stuttered, dumbass.

"hmm," hoseok hummed, then turned away, "see? liar."

yoongi frowned, rolling his eyes. "can't ever lie to you."

hoseok flashed a smile, "you know it."

"so that's why you've came here for a few days straight." yoongi said to himself, but ended up saying it a bit too loudly, and hoseok's head snapped over.

"no," he said. " i just like sitting here with you. i like listening to music with you. i like having lunch with you, because you're my best friend."

yoongi's eyes widened slightly at the random outburst, "wha-"

"you make it seem like i always need an excuse to come hangout with you. giving you lunch, needing something to discuss- no, yoongi, we're friends. i come here because i want to." hoseok's voice was low, but reassuring as yoongi found a smile tugging at his lips.

"hoseok?"

"yeah?"

"i cherish you, you know that right."

hoseok smiled, turning to lean his head on yoongi's shoulder. "obviously." he smirked, "there's only one of me, you'd better cherish me."

yoongi glared at him, bumping his shoulder up slightly as hoseok groaned in pain. yoongi half smiled as hoseok laughed slightly.

he stayed in that position, and yoongi's heart quickly sped up, and his cheeks started to grow warm.

quickly, say something before he notices your heart is beating too fast. preferably something that will also lower your heart-

"hoseok, what do you like about your girlfriend?" yoongi blurted out suddenly. there was a slight silence, and that's when yoongi decided he wanted to die.

fuck.

nice fucking going yoongi. you couldn't have asked anything else?

something to lower your heartbeat not something to break your heart.

yoongi sighed, he was done for now. hoseok's probably not going to answer-

"she's pretty. a real pretty girl." hoseok said suddenly, a soft smile on his face. yoongi felt his heart sink a bit, but he was the one who asked, so he would listen, and sit through it.

"she always has these pretty nails and pretty skirts on, they make me smile when i see her. her face looks like she paints on it with gold sometimes and it just makes her look so pretty. i dunno, when we talk, she makes me laugh and she makes me happy." hoseok glanced back at yoongi and grinned, "cheesy, huh." he sighed, then closed his eyes.

oh.

yoongi found his heart shattered in to millions of pieces. he regretted asking. he wanted to take it back, he wanted to un-listen to everything he just heard. he really knew how to torture himself.

"that's- you kinda sound like a simp." yoongi mumbled, his voice cracked slightly, but hoseok didn't notice. 

"shut up." he stuck out his tongue and yoongi laughed slightly, hoping it would help him avoid the stinging in his eyes. yoongi inhaled slightly, clearing the thoughts out of his head.

'she's pretty, a real pretty girl.'

yoongi's heart cracked as he replayed the words in his head.

if only he was a pretty girl. if only he could be hoseok's pretty girl.

he wished he was a girl. if he were a girl, he could be hoseok's. but he knew he wasn't. he knew he wouldn't ever be anything more than a friend to hoseok, and that's what hurt the most.

because hoseok only liked pretty girls.

the bell rang and yoongi and hoseok went back to their classes. they both didn't have any classes with each other after that, and yoongi had walked home by himself that day, his thoughts filled with the words hoseok had said about his girlfriend.

he already felt the tears gathering in his eyes.

he pushed open his door, running straight to his room and slamming the door shut. he wiped his sweater over his eyes as he let out a shaky breath.

"it's fine, stop over thinking it." yoongi whispered to himself, placing his hand over his chest to calm his breathing. he opened his door and went to the bathroom, staring at himself in a mirror.

'she always has pretty nails and pretty skirts..'