I don't normally share my life experience on any social media platform. Why? Well I find it toxic to some degree, the users I mean, but sometimes on rare occasions it is not.
And now you wonder why I am here, writing this down, sharing this to you, whoever you are.
Heck! I don't even know if you will ever get to read this, hell! I don't even know if this is going to work. But I'll take my chances. Just like we always do with life. You might wonder what is it I'm talking about, then let me go back to the where this all started.
Let me tell you a story.
My name is, let's just say Damian Flux, for privacy sakes I'm not going to include any more personal information. I do work for a small company since 2018.
Now, in order for me to get to work, I need to ride a bus, which takes about 3 hours max. I have a hobby where in order to not get bored, I watch other passengers do their thing, it keeps me occupied and it amuses me that they are so engrossed in whatever mundane things they are doing that they don't even notice me observing them.
But last Friday was different, it felt different, in the bus there were only 2 passengers, me and a girl who sat at the very back of the bus. It made the hair at the back of my neck stand up. To clarify, I was not scared, I was just weird out. But I pushed it aside thinking maybe it was because most of the seats are empty than usual.
An hour later this girl suddenly looked up and stared at me intently, like she's wondering if I am supposed to be there. Then she started to hum, and she started to sing, the most calming, beautiful song that I've ever heard in my life, I stared and listened intently, I was so captivated by her soft, melancholic voice. I felt every word, as it clung and tug at my heart.
"You oh poor soul that has lost its way among the crowd,
A remnant of what once was, covered in shroud
Remember, what you once were and you will see
Remember where you are and you will truly see
Oh poor soul that stays lost among the crowd
Please remember so you will see behind the dark shroud."
The song stuck to me, for it made me feel all the emotions, all of it, like a sunrise after a dark night, feeling all the life, energy, I feel like I was energy itself pure and free. Her song stuck to me, like a sad song on a rainy day. It held on to me with every fiber of its words and melody.
I was lost in trance both from the girl singing and the song itself. Then the bus suddenly stopped, and I broke from the trance and look up, the girl stood up and walked by me towards the door. She turned and looked at me, and she mouthed the words,
"I am sorry, but you need to let go".
Then she exited through the door. As the bus started again, our stares lingered across the window even as the bus was quite a distance away from her.
I was confused, what the hell does she mean by that? Then we reached our stop, I told the driver that it’s my stop,
But he didn't hear me, so I said it out loud this time. Still he didn't heard me, he just massage his neck and said
“That was a cold wind".
Thank God he stopped because I'm going to be late for work. As the door opened, a few passengers came in as I got out.
As I walked towards the gate of the company, a piece of newspaper flew on my feet and I saw, me...
The headlines says
"A company man named Damian Flux,found dead, shot on the bus, six times"
Suffice to say my world broke down,
I remember bits and pieces, but not everything.
I was shot on the bus trying to save a girl from a robber, or was it a mugger? I don't remember which is which.
I went home, and I remember her, the girl, she’s the same girl that I tried to save, she's the one singing that oh so sweet and beautiful song, I still hear her and her song in my head from time to time. I cherished it like its mine; it serves as a reminder for me.
I know I’m dead, a poor soul, lost in this world, neither in heaven nor in hell, just lost. And it begs the question, how many more are out there? Just like me? A lost soul, not knowing they have passed on, going through their daily routine, not knowing they were already gone.
I’m starting to find my way back, I don’t even know where it is I’m going, I just feel it, the song helps me.
Now I ride buses, any bus, and I start to sing that beautiful song, in hopes that someone lost as me may hear it, and they may find their way again. Find their self again among this world of shroud.
I hope this find its way to you, I pray that it would, whoever you are that may read this. Cause maybe you are just like me.
I hope you find your way too.
-End.
