I Do.

Chapter One

Cas' POV

Not a day has gone by that I haven't thought of that night when the angel visited me. He gave me a choice. Life or Dean. It's obvious what I chose. Life wouldn't be worth living if I didn't have Dean in it. When I saw him the next day I fought the urge to hold his hand. We got along good from the start. Everything happened just like the angel said, everything. Right now I'm laying in my hospital bed with Dean asleep right next to me. We've been through so much together. I mess with the IV in my arm that's literally pumping the life into me. It's not blood that is compatible with mine though. Doctor said it could kill me or help me long enough to get the type I need. Either way, I'm bound to die. I rub shapes onto the back of Dean's hand with my thumb, careful so he doesn't wake up. I kiss the top of his head and his mouth turns up at the corners a little bit. He blinks his eyes open and smiles at me. "Hi." I say softly. He sits up and says, "Hey, how you feelin'?". I intertwined our fingers, "A little better. I can talk, so that's a plus." I smile. I look at the mirror on the wall across from my bed. I look like a walking corpse. My skin is pale, my lips are colorless pretty much, my eyes are dull. But apparently I look better than I did a few hours before. Which is just pitiful considering what I look like right now. Dean kisses my lips softly and I smile, "I love you, Dean.". I think back to when I found out that this would happen. About how much pain I could've saved myself. But even on my death bed I don't regret it. It was worth it. All of it. "So worth it." I mutter out loud. "What, babe?" Dean said. I shook my head as if to shake if off. I lay in Dean's arms and fall asleep.

I wake up coughing. Each cough getting more violent. Dean rubs my back and says, "Hey, it's gonna be okay.. Get it out, baby.". There's a really weird taste in my mouth. Tastes like iron? Is that right? I cough really loud and into my hand. I pull my hand back and there's a clot of blood in it. "D-Dean.." I manage to say. Dean shoots up and grabs me a garbage can. He gives it to me and then runs out to find a doctor. I cough up quite a bit of blood actually. This is it. This is where the 'dream' stopped. This very moment. I find out if I live or die right now. I cough up more blood and look around for Dean. I start getting light headed. I see Dean run inside again with a man in a white lab coat walk in, the doctor I presume. I hold my hand out for Dean and he grabs it. He kneels down by my bed and says, "I love you, Cas.. It's gonna be okay. I'm not gonna let you - ". That was the last thing I heard from him. The doctor pushes him out of the room. He pulls my IV out of my arm and a few nurses come in with some machinery. The nurses check my pulse. "It's slowing down, we're gonna lose him!" one of them shouted. The doctor holds two handles in his hand with metal ends and a nurse squeezes a gel substance onto it. The doctor rubs the two together and presses it down on my chest. Over and over and over. I feel a surge of energy go through me each time the doctor pushes down. I can hear what's going on around me but that's about it. Every other sense is shut down. I just want to scream for Dean. Please God, if you're real, let me live. For Dean. Please.