Although I have published stories recently, I wasn't planning to write something personal ever again because somewhere in-between my writing, I realized that although it felt so damn good to lost in the beauty and comfort of words, it is a shame to live only in words and poems and never really truly accepted life. It was an escape, yes but that escape doesn't feel real.
But as this pandemic happens, I have encountered a lot by the changes that's happening in the world and how can it possibly happen only by staying at home.
I am tired but I don't want to cry
I'm done but I don't want to quit
Because for once, I wanted to be a facade of a strong, reliable person that I've always wanted to be
I know it's not the time to be weak but I'm tired fighting for my way up
I'm done with all the arrogant, selfish people I know and I regret to have them in my life
I am tired explaining my fears
I am done understanding the concept of understanding
I am so through with all the bad shits that kept on happening
I've had enough of every bit of dreams I had to sacrifice and accepting that it isn't for me
Is there really nothing that I deserve?
I want so badly to get away, to live away but I feel so helpless and hopeless
Used. Scarred. Disappointed. Frustrated,
CHA
