There were five tidy card stacks on the table, but only four people seated.
"Lids! Hurry up will you? You're on!"
Liddy stumbled out of the kitchen, where the kettle was whistling anxiously. "What? No, can't be, Ray. I was first in the last round."
"And that," Ray said, "is why you are on now, matey potatey. Jump to it, big guy."
"Alright, man, hold your horsies for a sec. I got a brew to do, and – "
"Your cuppa can wait 'til after, Lids. Otherwise you default, and..." Ray sighed, "well, y'know. All that."
"Christ, right, not messin' around, are we." Liddy closed the sliding door to the kitchen, then sat on one of the growing number of empty chairs surrounding the table. The seat's cushion was still disturbingly warm. "Who's first?"
Ray's eyes narrowed. "Did you just miss our bloody conversation somehow, yeah? Why you even bloody askin'? Moron."
Liddy's eyes widened, and his lower lip trembled. "Ah, yeh, sorry. Okay, okay. It's me, right? 'cause I was first out last round, right?"
Ray glanced at the other three at the table – Big Bert, Shayna, and the Duffster. Big Bert and the Duffster were shaking their heads, while Shayna was chuckling quietly.
"Liddy," Ray said carefully, "I'm guessin' I gotta go through and explain the bloody rules again, don't I."
Liddy's lower lip trembled even more. It looked like a sausage having a seizure. "I... yeh, sorry, Ray. It's just a bit complicated, man. Like, you keep changing the rules and such, and – "
"I don't keep changing the bloody rules," Ray said quietly.
"That's right, he don't," Big Bert interjected.
"Shut it, Bert. No-one asked for yours, yeah?"
"But I was just pointin' out – "
"I said shut it, Bert!"
Big Bert retreated into a low mumble.
Ray returned his attention to Liddy. "Pick your cards up and let's go, Lids. You're first, and maybe with all your beginner's luck you been havin', you'll still be in next round, yeah?"
"I... okay, okay, yeh, man, I got it, I'm on it." Liddy picked up his stack of cards, and began arranging them in order. "Right... right, so let's see. Er, Ray?"
"What."
"Three aces and another pair works, right?"
Ray huffed, rolled his eyes. "You really givin' away what's in your hand? You are a bloody moron!"
"Look, I'm just askin', yeh? 'cause the last round you said it didn't – "
"I didn't say anything last round!"
"That's right, he didn't," Big Bert interjected again.
"Bert," Ray said curtly.
"What? What I do?"
Ray's eyes were wide now, and his cheeks were flushed. He didn't say anything. He didn't need to.
Big Bert once more retreated into a mumble.
"It's – it's fine," Liddy said, still arranging his hand. "Look, I won't ask anymore, you just tell me if whatever I drop ain't workin', yeh?"
"Oh, we'll tell you, awright," Ray said, and he grinned coldly. "Instant default, yeah? And then – "
"I get it, Ray," Liddy replied, but his lower lip quivered once more, an aftershock. "Okay, okay. I'm ready, yeh."
"Then dish 'em out."
Liddy lay four sixes out on the table. "There."
Shayna leaned forward to take a look. "Get your peepers on that, boys," she said, then laughed.
Ray glanced around the table. "Anyone got an answer to that? Four sixes?" He looked back at Liddy. "Which, by the way, you moron, is technically a 'bomb', so you just wasted an opportunity, yeah?"
Liddy's eyes widened. "I did?"
"You did, yeah."
Liddy reached for the cards. "Then – "
Ray put a hand over the stack, blocking him. "Too late, moron. Unless you're up for an early default."
Liddy tucked his hand back under the table. "No, man. No, I'll play that, then. Sure."
Ray looked at the others. "Anyone got an answer for that? Four sixes? No?" He turned back to Liddy, winked, and grinned evilly. "Again, Lids. Keep 'em up, matey."
"Potatey."
"What?"
"You usually say 'matey potatey'."
Ray took his time to respond. "You havin' a go?"
"No, I'm not having a go, man."
Ray slammed the table with a closed fist. Everyone jumped. "Then hurry up and play your next bit!"
Liddy had turned white. "Right, right, yeh, sorry," he said. He placed another set of cards down. "Three aces and two sevens."
"Right," Ray said, examining his own hand. "Better, yeah? Much better, Lids. Let's get this show on the bloody road!"
**
(Author's note: The amazing cover art is by Otakufangirl_07 - @otakufangirl_07 .)
