Teddy Bear [ Taehyung X Y/N ]

(6) Space Cadet

"you really should eat something, are you sure that you don't want to eat anything?"

Taehyung spoke from behind me as I was watching TV alone in the living room as the others were busy doing nightly chores or other things that they'd usually do every night. 

I shook my head and didn't look at him as I focused on the TV "I'm not really all that hungry. Besides, this isn't my house so I shouldn't be using up your things." I spoke calmly and was too tired to really put much energy into being more awake at that point in time.

"That's stupid."  Taehyung responded with a tad bit of just anger in his voice as usual when ever he disagreed with someone or something. He shook his head out of a bit of disapproval.   
"You should just eat. We offered it to you. It's a bit rude to just say no to something we wanted to give to you, isn't it? Definitely rude."

"What..? I'm rude? Oh.." I spoke with an unsure feeling behind it. A bit hurt I nodded and agreed but still didn't say anything of value. "Sorry"

"If you are so sorry then you should eat and stop being rude."   He chuckled lightly and shook his head as I looked at him a bit confused. 
"I'm joking. You aren't rude. But seriously, you should really eat something."

I sat on the couch and looked at my feet. My socks didn't match. One was blue and the other was purple. My socks never match. Too tired and lazy to match them.
"You look silly with your socks like this."
I know.

Sometimes I wondered where these thoughts come from. No one ever mentions my socks unless I do first. When they are mentioned, those few times are never negative.
        Do socks matter? Well obviously they do for wearing shoes and such but socially and in matters not in an actual wearing matter. Do socks make people ever think less of you? Like if you don't wear a sock that is the color they think looks better with your outfit, would they think that you are stupid?

As I was in my own little world thinking about socks of all things, I didn't notice that Taehyung was trying to hand me a blanket until he threw it at me. Startled I let out a small yelp.

"Omg do you ever know whats going on around you?" Taehyung immediately spat out.
      I gave him an angry frown and he rolled his eyes at me.

"Just go to bed, the couch has comfy pillows that you can crash on. And don't even think about knocking on my door, I have things to do."

I nodded and watched him walking out of the room as he slides his hand on the wall turning off the lights. I sat on the couch for a bit in my own thought until it hit me in the head. I am at some absolute strangers house. Am I stupid? They could murder me, kidnap me, or do anything else that is horrible to me. Who the hell just goes out and hangs out with random people and then crashes at there place?? This isn't some romance sappy story book or something. Right?

I sat on the couch yelling at myself until I figured out that it'd be smart of me to just leave as they weren't watching me at the moment.

I folded the blanket and made everything neat on the couch and then went out the door walking down all the stairs. Using an elevator may be what many would do but I need to work out a bit, even though i'm tired and really want to just pass out on the dirty floor I run down the stairs and the continue to run out the building. I meet a dark road with only street lights. No one is here, just me and my phone and earbuds. My only other person with me is the voice in my head that hurt me more than the cuts and bruises that cover me and will just multiply with no end.

Playing one of my favorite songs very loudly into my ears I jog back to where I live. Back to the shitty pathetic looking place I call my home. As i'm jogging I start to feel little water droplets fall onto my body. Crap. It starts to pour down rain very quickly and I start to run back home even though i'm so tired I could pass out already. 

Finally, I see my place. I enter it absolutely soaked and dripping rain water onto my floor. I sigh and start to feel a headache happening and I take an Advil before getting into the shower. Th water burns my skin at first as my body is freezing from the cold rain. I quickly finish up showering, wash my face. And finally, I go to sleep. By sleep I mean laying down for a few hours until my body finally just passes out.

 Space cadet - a person being zoned out a lot and always in your own world thinking of things.