Fated Insurrection (Book 3)

Chapter 15

"I built these walls to hide my ghosts
Your fingers trace the wounds exposed
I try and try to let you in
But I fail again and again..."

~~Bad Wolves
~Killing Me Slowly

****************

~Michael~

My body felt numb, muscles frozen and the room felt too cold and too hot all at once. My chest grew tight and my vision swam, the edges darkening as if I were about to pass out. Every thought in my head vanished, the neurons unable to fully process what I was seeing on the small laptop screen.

I was vaguely aware of someone saying my name but my mouth wouldn't work to form any words. It couldn't be possible, but there he was, his frozen image plastered on the screen like a ghost I never thought I would see again. What had they been watching as I was heading back from the kitchen? I had just wanted a glass of water but had then I had heard his voice, my attention instantly drawn to it like a magnet.

"What… what is that?" I croaked, ignoring everyone's curious stares, their thoughts beating against my weak shield like rain.

"Michael? Hey, look at me." Nova demanded gently, suddenly standing in my line of vision.

Big blue-violet eyes looked down at me, swirling with concern and making my heart stutter in my chest like it always did when he looked at me. I opened my mouth to speak but nothing came out, my body unable to communicate with my racing mind. My stomach churned, twisting into anxious knots as Nova placed a worried hand on my shoulder.

"Deep breaths, Michael, or you're going to pass out," Nova instructed, squeezing my shoulder. "Talk to me. What just happened?"

"I, uh, that…" I tried but my chest grew tighter, a lump in my throat and prevently oxygen from filling my lungs. Gasping for breath, I looked at Nova with panicked eyes. "I… can't…"

"Nev, watch the broken glass and bring him some water," Nova told his sister without looking away from me. "Now Mike, I need you to focus on me, okay?"

He took my hand and placed it against his chest. I could feel the steady beat of his heart and the rhythmic flex of hard muscle beneath his shirt as he breathed steadily in and out. That wasn't helping, my thoughts scattering even more, and Robbie's possessive growl only served to make my anxiety try to swallow me whole.

Oh shit, I'm not going to survive this fucked up mess, I thought frantically as I tried to snatch my hand back but Nova tightened his grip on my wrist to hold me in place. He finally turned his gaze away and narrowed his eyes.

"Don't start, Robbie," Nova warned impatiently. "That's not helping and we've been over this."

"You could just let him die," Robbie muttered but without conviction as he flopped back onto the couch.

"Pouting isn't your thing, babe." Nova turned back to me. "Alright, do what I do. Breathe in… and out… in… out…"

Nevada stepped up beside me and held out a new glass, the clear liquid begging for me as Nova released my hand. With shaking hands wrapped around the cool surface, I took a cautious sip and hoped I didn't choke. I was already humiliated by my current behavior and getting strangled on a sip of water would just top the cake.

I didn't look at Nova while I sipped from the glass and forced my breathing under control. It wasn't easy but with a small spell dancing around in my head, I finally managed to get myself under control after what seemed like hours.