Promise You Won't Fall In Love With Me

Chapter 29

Stefan was sitting on a big, cold rock by the lake. The rock was placed on the entrance of the lake and it was fully surrounded by water. Stefan had always believed, if they had been able to look at it from the above, it would look like a small island. Rebekah and him, when they were kids, would sneak out of the house in the middle of the night, lie down on the rock and watch the sky above them.

A lot has happened in this house by the lake. This is where Rebekah broke her leg while trying to climb a tree in front of the house. This is where Stefan was afraid to come off the rooftop on which he climbed while chasing a squirrel. This is where Rebekah and him shared their first kiss only to conclude kissing each other is like kissing your grandma on the lips for Christmas. This is where Nik had his first party when he moved to Mystic Falls.

And now, everything has changed. Nik is getting married. Rebekah is, for the first time in her life, in a promising relationship. Damon and Katherine are married and have a son. Elena is a published author.

And him? He's right back where he started.

Someone who would say and do everything to get in some girl panties. Someone who doesn't think about the consequences or the future at all. But before, all of that had a purpose, he enjoyed it, and now, it became a routine. It was his thing, something he would do, something that was expected from him to do.

Once upon a time, things used to be different. When he had Elena. She came into his life and she had changed everything. She showed him the real meaning of love, life, happiness.. even sex. She always thought he was the one who taught her everything she needs to know about sex, but actually, she was the one who taught him how wonderful it can be when it's not meaningless. She taught him how to not be selfish and to be considerate of your partners wishes, thoughts and movements. She was the only person he was ever synchronized with.

And then, she was gone.

As she left him behind, she took with herself everything she gave him with time. Except memories. No one could take memories away from him, no matter how much he wished otherwise. Sometimes he liked getting lost in them, but most of the time, they would hurt him. Because he would remember what he had, he knew there is something better, something more, and he could not have it. It's like standing in front of the gates of Heaven, seeing everything through the bars, but not being able to go in.

Having her in his life again, she made him wish all of those things back. He wanted to feel the way he used to feel. And he knew the only way for him to feel like that is if she was by his side.

He tried to hate her. He spent a lot of time trying to hate her. Then he tried to forget her. When he realized he can't, he tried to hate her more. But no matter how much he tried, he could never hate her. He loves her. He always did and always will. There's no other woman he will ever love as much as he loves her and he will never need or want anyone as much as he needs and wants her.

She's a part of him, and without her, he will always only be half alive.

He could not forget the way her voice cracked when they were trapped in the basement the other day. He tried to understand her reasons for breaking up with him. He spent a lot of time understanding her, and while his heart did not let him, after a while, his brain noticed him she had a point. Because being away from her had hurt him too.

Rebekah asked him would he forgive her, and he told her there's nothing to forgive. He wants to be with her. He never wanted anything else. But his pride was louder than his heart at the moment she told him she did not break up with Tyler to be with him.

Words coming out from her mouth were saying one thing, and her body was saying something completely different. The way she tensed when he touched her, the way she was trying to catch her breath, her moans when his lips met her skin. All of that indicated she wants him.