The Soulmates Who Aren't Soulmates

Chapter 5

Jason looked at the window in Tim's home. The clone just came, grab Tim and flew away. And after what r-Tim just said.. well it would be disparagement to say Jason was over whelmed. It was beyond it. Wayyyy beyond it. Jason was sure he was going to scream because of it.

It started when he saw other him and Dick hugging Tim like their's life depended on it. Other him said "Goodbye baby bird" to Tim before disappearing into a flash of light.

It got a bit stronger when rep- nope. He isn't a replacement.
It got a bit stronger when Tim snapped at B.
("You know B, what I do with my dad's killer is none of your business.")

And then he accidentally told them he don't have a damn spleen. And then.. then he. Just. Disappeared.

The moment Jason saw the kid isn't in the cave he took his bike and speed his way to Tim's home.

He really can't remember much of the conversation (he remembers it all plus the way Tim's fists clenched around nothing), just that he asked (told) Tim to comes back to the cave. To his family

And Tim.. Tim laugh was so bitter. So cold. It made Jason shiver.

("Family? What family? The one that pushed me away and tried to murder me or my biology family? Because the biology one is dead and I don't think the other one even want me around, after all I'm just the place holder, right?"

Jason had nothing to say. He was in a bad place. Tim knows it. And Tim can't really think that rhey don't want him. He can't really think he was only a fucking place holder. Right?)

Jason forced himself out of the door (no one can come in without Tim knowing after all, the guy change the password every two days, how he remembers it is a mystery) and back to his bike.

Jason wanted to find Tim and just take one of Dick's moves and hug the hell out of him. He needs to know Tim is fine now. He wants to hug him. He wants to be with him right now. And more importantly, he wants to go back in time to punch himself.

He wants to change everything.

Tim's words echoed in his ears and he wasn't sure if he wants to cry or to scream more.

("Listen Jason, I understand you don't want me. I get it. You don't even have to say it. Or pretend you want me around. I'm still going to be a little soldier. It's fine")

He can't be with someone right now, so he's and Dick's place isn't an option. Maybe a safehouse? He have one near by. Yup. That's a good plan.

He got inside the safehouse as he texted Dick 'I have something to do, I won't be at home for couple days' and then he threw the device on the couch and just fell next to it, making it jump a bit before landing back on the couch.

It was his fault. He should have been there more, but how exactly you let someone who you tried to kill know you care?

But. What happened- if he was available he could have let Tim know it. How in the names of the goddamns souls in hell was he supposed to do it now? He wasn't there when Tim needed him. When Tim called him. And Tim acted after it like it didn't happened.

Jason isn't sure he would have ever know about it if Tim wouldn't be so tired and mad. How can he make it up to Tim? How can he make it better? He don't even know if Tim would let him. He don't know if he can help Tim if Tim would let him.

The cold look in Tim's eyes when he said what he said. The shock experience in Tim's face when he realized what he said. The silence that surnnded them after it. And it definitely was his goddamned luck that just as he opened his mouth to say something clone boy opened the doors. He didn't even notice that Tim pushed the button in his phone. And he was left alone, staring at the window.

Jason wanted to take Tim's words out of his mind but at the same time he wanted to hear them until he will find a way to make it better. If that would ever happen.

He don't know if he should tell the others. But if he wants to get Tim back he needs to. But just.. how can he say it to them? How in hell Tim said it? It.. it made him shiver.

Jason grunted and closed his eyes.

He blinked his eyes open because he couldn't stand the look on Tim's face.

("Me or red robin?" Because red robin can help you, just send an email. But red won't come to the cave to hang out and I'm not even a Wayne anymore")

Jason screwed up his eyes again and swiped a hand across his eyes. Breathing out deeply as he did so.

("Come on baby bird" the look Tim gave him was like he was in pain. "Come home with me, to our family"

"I don't have family here" Tim's whispered, but Jasin was sure it was just to keep himself from screaming it.

"Of course you do!")

Jason didn't wanted to but he let his mind take over and with Tim's last words before he fell to a peaceless sleep.

("No I really don't!" And the method to keep himself quite didn't stand long. "Where was this family when I called them for help? Nowhere! And, and I was dead for a minute, after I called you to help me, I called everyone! I called for back up and I died because none of you came!. That's when I finally learned that everyone I care for, everyone I love, would always leave me in the end and never return the feelings. So no Jason. I don't have a family. Not here at least.")