" I'm sorry to my unknown lover
Sorry that I can't believe
That anybody ever really
Starts to fall in love with me
Sorry to my unknown lover
Sorry I could be so blind
Didn't mean to leave you
And all of the things that we had behind"
Sorry by Halsey...
July 12... the day of the year that you hated the most. Even when you were younger and had no trauma you hated you birthday. Your gifts always ended up to charity and you didn't mind it at all. You always felt meaningless for this world.
You went down after two hours of hesitation and you were happy to not see someone there.
You decided to have breakfast. You made scrambled eggs with ham and drank water. You scrolled through social media while eating and you saw a lot of fans greeting you for your birthday and you were touched.
" If the only knew the truth about me, they wouldn't love me this much" you said to yourself.
After you were done eating, you washed your plate and you heard everyone coming home. You started to run upstairs as fast as you could to avoid them, surprisingly succeeding.
" Y/n, let me remind you that you are a grown ass woman and that you should stop running from people" you said to yourself.
You knew that eventually you would've had to go downstairs or that they will come here. Did you give a damn tho? Nope.
" Y/n, you are immature" you stated once again to yourself.
After a lot of debates with yourself you decided to go down and when everyone saw you they started singing 'happy birthday' and you were drowning in the embarrassment. You were standing there playing with your fingers.
" Y/n, get dressed we are going out." Chan said leaving speechless.
" Where out?" you asked.
" JYPE. We all threw a party and since it's your party you have to be there. Be elegant." he continued.
Even though you didn't want it at all, you thought about something.
" Alcohol will be there, right?" you asked and Jisung nodded.
You ran immediately upstairs to get dressed. You needed alcohol more than anything in this world.
You put on this dress
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and this heels
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These were the only elegant stuff that you had. You bought them for cases where you had to be elegant.
Your hair was in a messy bun and your make up wad a very simple and nude one. You didn't have a lot of accessories exept for a bracelet that had engraved " Love you". You didn't know why you had that bracelet, but it was cute.
When you went down the first thing that you did was go in the kitchen to eat some bread. You missed the tase of it.
" Hey gorgeous" Chan said smiling.
" H-y" you said with your mouth full of bread.
" You are cute right now." he continued smiling.
" Shut up" you said embarrassed.
' Y/n don't fall to hard for him!' you said to yourself in your mind.
" Can I kiss the birthday girl?" he asked coming closer to you.
You felt your heart skip a beat, but you needed to refuse.
" No.." you said firmly.
You just destroyed the cute and lovely atmosphere.
" Chris.. I'm sorry. I know that we are together.. it's just that.. I.. Don't want to fall too hard for you. I don't want to hurt you in any way possible. I'll end up doing it , knowing myself." you said looking in his eyes.
" I understand. I just miss you. You have been distant since that night." he said after drinking water.
Everyone was ready now, so we were good to go.
" How many people will be there? 20?" you asked not knowing what to expect.
" A few bands." Nayla said and you nodded.
When you arrived you saw a lot of dispatchers.
"how did they know" you wondered.
A lot of fans were there too and a lot of them weren't hope.
" How many bands?" you asked before entering the company and half of the industry was here. Everyone from the Big 3 were here.
" Mmmm... why is everyone here?" you asked towards the people that you have been living with for the past months and they dodged the aswer with a " Y/n, there's italian food here."
After everyone saw that you arrived it was like a meeting. People didn't stopped coming to say their "happy birthday". You didn't mind meeting these amount of people, but you wanted something chill. Something with the people that you were very familiar with. You were excited to meet a lot of your inspirations, but there were so many people here.
"This will be a long night..." you sighed.
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Hey guys... sorry for not posting as often as I should and want.. I just have some problems. I am taking a lot if medications that mess up my routine. I won't get more into the details. Thank you for supporting this story💜.
