Dreamers Never Die

Thirteen - When Can We Talk Again?

I just want to quickly apologize for the lack of updating. I've lost a lot of inspiration for this story and it takes a lot more effort for me to come up with ideas now. Please bear with me.
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Only one word could describe what I was feeling.

Lost.

I didn't know where I was going, what I was doing, half the time it felt as if it was a struggle to even say a sentence to someone. Even with my new found girlfriend, whom I was most definitely appreciative of, it almost seemed awkward anytime we came into contact with each other. 

I was always worrying if holding her hand was something she was uncomfortable with, even though we do it often, or if she actually hated giving hugs and just couldn't bring herself to tell me. It was a constant worry of mine and I just wanted to escape everything which was exactly what I planned on doing.

"Tay, you seem lost in subspace." Jenna laughed happily, making me look up at her from my spot in her lap. It was a struggle seeing as I had been so comfortable snuggled into her and being lost in my thoughts that I hadn't wanted to look up to see her.

"Let's run away." I said yawning, snuggling back into her and getting comfortable. 

There was a long moment of silence between us, it almost seeming like she was taking the idea almost seriously until I heard her laugh again, this time it sounding forced.

"What? In the middle of the year? Are you sick or something?" She joked. 

I frowned at the question, hating having the idea being shot down so quickly as if I was delusional. I don't know why the idea had sounded so absurd to her. I had grown tired of everything here and at that point it's time for me to move onto something new. What that something, or someplace rather, is I don't know yet, but I crave getting to where ever it is and I didn't want to leave Jenna behind in the process of me growing.

"Okay, fine babe. But where our we going to live?" It was obvious by the tone of her voice that she was just playing along with the idea because she knew I was upset about her shooting it down so fast. I knew she wasn't going to agree at this point, but I played along too wanting to change her opinion.

"We could get an old bus." I said after a moment of thought, nodding at the idea. "We could take turns driving and park at those rest stops at night." 

The thought of both of us spending time together just in a van together and driving around to all of the places I had imagined seemed amazing. Just leaving everything in general sounded amazing and I wanted to go with the plan as soon as I could.

"Where are we going to get a van?" Jenna questioned, still sounding like she didn't think this plan was going to work. I don't know when I have ever had a plan that had failed. I suppose my lack of plans was more of a concern than any that may have worked in the end.

"I could get one. I've got money." I crossed my arms over my chest and rolled over onto my side again so I could look up at her again. Her stupid smug smile that didn't believe this was going to work.

Jenna smoothed some hair from my face and the smile on her face widened a little, as if she was talking to a little child about their dreams that she didn't want to crush. "Okay, we'll talk about it when you get us a van."

Like the little kid she was acting like I was, I crossed my arms and huffed. I wanted this to work and I was going to make sure that it did. Make sure that I get to follow through with my dream idea. If Jenna is included or not is optional, it was just an added bonus of getting my quite delightful girlfriend to go along with me.

But I was going to make sure I could prove her wrong.

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My hands rested over Jenna's eyes as I led her down the short sidewalk. I had made her walk like this all the way to my apartment complex and even into the parking lot. Despite the variety of other cars that were parked there, mine stood out the most and I didn't want her to figure it out long before I could tell her.

When we got to the large purple and green van, I removed my hands and let her get a look at the huge old car I had bought. It's a lot easier to just ask your brother for his "bands" old van than some would think and definitely a lot easier than having to save up enough to buy one.

"Now let's talk." My arms crossed over my chest, reciting the promise she had made me before about getting the van before we could even discuss my idea any further.

"Tay..." Jenna paused and began to circle the van as she looked it up and down. "It has 'sex danglers' written on the side.."

My mouth suddenly dropped, the shock of her not even bothering to mention the actual plan was beginning to make me mad, which rarely happened to me and normally it was over more major things than this. 

I just took a deep breath and shook my head, hoping the anger would just shake off. "And..?" 

Her face contorted into a confused look as she looked over at me. "What do you want me to say, Tay? I can't just drop everything for you to whisk me off onto some adventure to god knows where in some van." She looked at me as if I was crazy and I have never been more frustrated.

Knowing I wasn't going to be able to say anything nice, I walked over and climed into the back of the van, slamming the door shut and beginning to pout like a little kid again.