Abducting BTS

Chapter 24 - So Easy it's Child's Play

Hoeseok's fist slammed into Yoongi's jaw before anyone could really react. When he didn't get off him, that's when Jungkook tried to grab him. 

Yoongi was still reeling back, struggling against gravity and his shock. I had never seen anything like that from Hoseok and by the astonishment evident on everyone's faces, neither had they.

Jungkook slipped his arm around Hoseok's shoulder, pulling him away even as he continued to struggle but all at once the fight seemingly left him and his body slumped into Jungkook's chest.

Yoongi had managed to recenter himself and now stood, still staring, gaping at Hoseok. He didn't even seem to bother the already swelling cheek.

Hoseok looked to him with such a genuinely hurt expression it pulled at my heart in guilt. "You nearly got yourself killed today... You. Not anyone else. Don't do that again..." Tears made his throat thick as he trailed off and in an instant Yoongi had wrapped his arms around Hoseok and pulled him close, muttering apologies.

Slowly, the hug increased and amassed more and more people until it was a writhing and emotional five-man hug.

Despite the happiness I felt that they were alive, a sharp and selfish dagger still twisted in my heart at the sight.

I knew I was only being hyper-emotional and irrational, but it still hurt as it once again hit me how truly alone I was. I had stabbed the closest thing I had to family in the back. He may have hurt me, but he was still there when no one else was. I still loved him. I didn't know if I'd ever shake that sick love I felt for him. The part that rued when he left and wanted to make him happy from more than fear.

In all the commotion I had forgotten to feel guilt, but now in the hollow left behind it sat heavily in my stomach. I had betrayed him. He was not a good man, he was awful and sick and toxic but nonetheless, I had betrayed him. How it must feel. If he truly loved me as he said... I had to change my focus as it swiftly became too much.

These people... They would always have each other. I was certain any other group of people would not be so stable at this point.

I was acutely aware of where I sat, perched on the edge of an ornate chez lounge too tense to sit any further back and even deep in thought still aware of my surroundings. Trained to be as such. I'd never lose that at least, didn't think it was possible that the training ingrained into me so feverishly could go. 

It was this awareness that had me knowing that Jin and Namjoon both were looking at me, glancing over from where they seemed to have resumed an interrupted conversation from earlier. They barely seemed to give much notice to the emotional scene before them. 

When I did blatantly look at them, it took a moment for them to notice and as such I could decipher what their expressions said before they masked them so quickly.

Distrust. Confusion. Even fear.

But unlike what I had grown almost accustomed to, it was actually directed at me.

The dagger in my heart twisted painfully even more and I couldn't bear to keep looking. Instead, I went back to over analysing the awkward and impromptu hug that included far too much back-slapping for that to be natural. It only lasted a few seconds more before breaking up.

As it slowly dissipated, I could catch faint mutterings of apologies as they sat. Whether for the hug or fight in the first place I don't know. 

Still, I couldn't dismiss what I had seen and yet neither could I bring myself to ask. I had a feeling I knew the answer already, and yet I couldn't work it out. They didn't seem angry I'd risked their lives... But what else new had I done?