please treat this oneshot kindly! i used female pronouns, please let me know if u want me to change that in later oneshots!
there is implied past sexual stuff but it's minimal. it is angst :( but i enjoyed this one.
enjoy!
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You were like the moon and he was the sun. It seemed you were both chasing each other. Either the wrong time or wrong place. There was always a bridge that could never be crossed. Volleyball, school, family and emotional availability. In all honesty, it is amazing that the two of them didn't go insane.
To define a relationship that is fluid and is as ever changing like a river, is impossible and can and will make you emotionally numb. (First name) was a girl of many talents and skills, but as a jack of all trades it also means she was a master of none. Bokuto was an elite level volleyball player, which takes too much time and energy. They were different people, whole worlds by themselves.
I can't make it tonight, got volleyball thingy, no hard feelings!
For sure, no problem,
As frustrating as hanging out with a supposed "friend", life is never simple.
With a heavy heart and a newly free uneventful night, homework and netflix were an easy choice. (First name) was content with the free given by the universe to her. Years and years wasted on fantasizing and daydreaming about a relationship that was teased to her by the higher powers above. Bokuto was great but are the tears worth being split over a guy that was unavailable?
Is it worth it to linger over a guy? Both of them knew that the other had feelings for the latter but they were never able to date or make anything official. Was it worth it? Was it worth the angst and energy?
These were the thoughts that consumed her mind into the late hours of the night while she completed her homework and binged the regular shows she watched. It was darker outside and was around 12 AM, when her photo rang.
"Hey, (First name). You up?" His voice carried through the phone, it was a little rough and raspy.
"Mmhn? Yeah? Why?" She asked while sitting up out of bed.
This was typical behaviour for him. This was how it always was. Him choosing her after everything was finished.
"I'm outside your place! Let me in." He whined in the usual tone he used with Akaashi.
Before he could let out another word, the door was open and she was standing on the other side.
She was like a breath of fresh air. The first drink of water after a long volleyball game. The first bite of an amazing homemade meal.
"I'm sorry... I missed you." He said stepping into her small place.
She knew what this meant. This happens everytime, it's a vicious cycle. Hearts get broken, bridges get burnt. But the path always leads them to this outcome. It will always be like this. He'll leave in the morning and they'll forget everything that happened the night before. Both of them will treat this as a dream that neither of them can ever live to its fullest.
"I missed you too, we can't." (First name) says slowly.
She needed to break this routine. She can't pretend to be his at night and be someone else by day.
"I know, I know... We both know this is the only way we can have any type of relationship other than friendship. We both want more, you know that (First name)." As much as Bokuto can be a little dumb, he can also be extremely perceptive.
(First name) sighed, she knew that she could never say no to him. She turned around purposefully so that her back was facing him, so she could hide how upset and how incredibly heartbroken she was. She knew what this was and what it becomes.
"Go take a shower. You're stinky." She said plainly hoping that he would ignore the lack of tone or emotion in her voice.
(First name)'s room was plain with a few decorations and nicknacks. After thirty minutes of silence, Bokuto walks into her room. The lights were turned off and the only light was the glow of (First name)'s phone. He had clothes, a toothbrush and even underwear at her place. He practically lived here.
He squished himself into bed next to her, cuddling up to her like it was second nature. Looking over at her, he sighed.
"Watching tiktoks again?" He said in a teasing tone as he settled his hand on her waist.
"Of course, it's funny and pretty easy to get addicted too." (First name) said as she kept scrolling.
Bokuto knew that this was all a lie. A bubble they had made, where outside factors such as time and responsibilities did not exist. They'd talk and laugh without a care in the world.
"...Bokuto, are we really gonna do this again?"
"Only if you're okay with it?"
"Not tonight. I just wanna cuddle and pretend that this is real for a little longer." She said cozying herself into his arms.
"How was your day? What did you eat for dinner?" (First name) quietly and softly mumbled to the owl looking man.
"I wasn't hungry so nothing. My day was fine, Akaashi was talking about you and Tendou. Was he bothering you today? If he is I can scold him." He replied casually with any malice towards anyone.
"No, Bokuto it's fine, Tendou's harmless. Don't worry about it." She shuffled around to face him. Time and time again she looks at his features. He was a handsome guy. (First name) like his hair but preferred his hair down because it makes it easier to play with. His eyes were piercing and captivating.
"(First name)... Call me Kotaro. We've been over this, please." He placed his free hand on the back of her neck, making it easier to bring her closer while also playing with her hair.
"I can't... Bokuto, you know why." She knew her eyes were tearing up threatening to overflow onto her face. (First name) knew if she started calling him Kotaro, it would be over, any self control she'd had would crumble and it would be harder to be without him.
"Hey, hey, hey... it's okay, such a cry baby. I know, I know. I'm sorry." He lightly teased her while pulling her into his chest.
This was the way it was. Chasing each other, never being able to catch what they wanted. Bokuto and (First name) were the sun and the moon. She'd wake up tomorrow with him gone for morning volleyball practice, sometimes she'd get a note or a text but as the days go on there would be nothing.
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i hoped this was okay! i wanna hear if this style of writing is better and if theres anyway i can improve
ily
-tsun
