Growing

Growing Part 21

Anna's POV:

"Noooo...stop."

I was trying to open my eyes as I heard the quiet, pained words. I didn't know where they were coming from at first in my haze, but I quickly realized it was Ag. She was still asleep and dreaming. She started to say more things.

"Stop... Anna... love... why?"

       She was breathing so hard and clearly in distress so I reached out to touch her and she flinched and shrunk away saying, "No! Don't touch me! I- I-..." she opened her eyes with a look of mixed emotions including confusion and fear. She locked eyes with my shocked ones. "Anna? Where- what happened, I..."

"You were having a dream and I woke you up."

She nodded.

"Can you tell me what it was about?"

"It's nothing I think. I don't remember. Can we go back to sleep I'm tired."

       She rolled over away from me. It hurt but I had to be understanding she was trying to process something that hurt her in the only way she knew how. I just wanted to be there for her but maybe it was too soon.
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Ag's POV:

       I lied to Anna for the first time. I mean a big lie, I guess. I said that I didn't remember the dream but I did. I knew what happened. It was about walking in on her cheating on me with Taylor. It seemed so real. I was sitting in traffic and I hadn't been able to get through to Anna for about an hour. I was a little worried but she was probably taking a nap, so I'd just leave her alone. I knew she was stressed with school. I finally make it to her house and I get a sinking feeling when I see an unfamiliar car in the drive way but neither Anna's mom's or stepdad's car is anywhere to be seen. I use the key Anna had made for me and walk in. My heart rate increases because now I see shoes that I've never seen before. I start toward Anna's room, hearing muffled noises, and push the door open. What I saw shattered me. Anna was laying on the bed with Taylor on top of her.

"What the fuck? Anna... I- why.... I thought you loved me? I love you!" I could barely get the words out I was so broken. She didn't even try to move.

"I got bored. I guess you weren't what I thought I wanted."

"No, please just stop. Stop! I know you love me too!"

"I guess not... bub."

       The last word hit so hard because she said it in a matter of fact tone. I ran out of the just as the two of them smiled and went back to kissing. Taylor's disgusting self all of my beautiful Anna, and she was letting Taylor do all of this. She wanted it! Then suddenly I was staring at Anna's worried face. I was so disoriented that I said "No! Don't touch me! I- I-..." I was breathing so hard. "Anna? Where- what happened, I..."

"You were having a dream and I woke you up."

       I nodded. There was so much going through my mind.

"Can you tell me what it was about?"

"It's nothing I think. I don't remember. Can we go back to sleep I'm tired."

       I knew exactly what happened, but I didn't tell her. I didn't want to hurt her because I knew she handled the situation with Taylor at the party so well, but I just had insecurities I guess. I didn't want to feel like this, I just wanted to trust her but I had a block. I love her so much.

       I rolled over and tried, but failed, to stop the tears from running. It all hurt to know that you have these types of issues like trust problems but it seems like there's nothing to stop them. I've been in a few situations where I've been cheated on, and it's the absolute worst feeling in the world, besides when I thought Anna wasn't going to survive her accident. Feeling like you weren't enough for someone to the point where they couldn't even break up with you before have sex with someone else, was so heart wrenching. They didn't care enough about your feelings and they did something to you that will never go away.
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Anna's POV:

       I heard Ag crying last night and I tried to get her to tell what's wrong but she just wouldn't open up. So I resorted to falling into an interrupted sleep. I knew it probably had something to do with what happened at the party between Taylor and I, but I thought I handled it well. I just wanted her to feel better. I struggle with trust and commitment and I know that Ag's been hurt in the past, so I know I need to prove to her that I only want her and no one else. She is my all and who I want to spend my time with.

       When I woke up Ag was sitting on the edge of the bed, her body facing away, hands on her knees with her face looking down. I sat up and said "Good morning, bub."

"Good morning. I'm gonna shower."

       She got up and rummaged through her duffle bag pulling out her toiletry bag. Grabbing her towel off the hook she headed to the bathroom. She shut the door and locked it, something she had never done around me especially since we became a thing.

The water to the shower started running but I could barely hear her sobs she tried to silence. I went to the door and leaned against it. I could see her shadow blocking the light along the bottom of the doorway. I slowly slid my shoulder down against the door with my hand trailing it. Tears sprung to my eyes because I didn't know how to help her. I couldn't take on this terrible pain that she felt.

"Babe let me help," I choked out against the door, "Tell me how to help you."

"You can't. It's my problem."
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(Part 21 Rewrite)