My Lonely Heart

My Lovely Heart

Kotori's POV

It's been a few years after Mae-chan's death. I always come visit her grave when I can. I always talk about my week mostly.. even if the conversation is short. I just..

I miss her a lot.

You-chan would be with me here and there as well, but she's really busy for the most part.

I replace the wilted flowers with fresh new lovely flowers for both Mae and Haro.

Mae was always the funny weirdo.. she would say the most weirdest things and go the most questionable things, but she always had fun doing it.

"Mae-chan.. me and You-chan have been talking about.. things... look." I look at my engagement ring on my left ring finger. I extend my arm out a bit and touch Mae's grave. "I just.. I always thought about the future.. and if you two were alive we would.. both be married to our special someone. I'm sure the four of us would have so much fun doing a lot of things together."

I again and countless times wipe my tears away. There's never a time where I don't cry when I visit Mae and Haro.

In my darkest, lowest days.. they were there for me.

"I'm married, Mae-chan. Me and You-chan are engaged. I.. I.. I'm so happy, but so sad as well.. I feel like from here on I should move on, but.. I can't let go."

I just keep starring at their graves.

Their wilted flower has been replaced.

I cleaned their gravestone.

I try.. I try anything.. but it's just silent.

Losing Mae was the hardest thing.. but.. I know she would get mad at me for sulking over this.

"You know.. maybe if I hadn't met You-chan.. and you haven't met Haro.. would we.. well.. do you think they both of us would end up falling in love? Maybe not.. Ohh what am I saying. I'm sure you'd joke about this and.. get naked in a heart beat. Your family is doing okay. It seems they haven't moved on just yet.. same with me, but we try. We loved you, Mae-chan. I miss you.. you were my only best friend when I moved here. I think of the past often.. I'd see you eating spicy food again and then you would feel sorry for yourself for eating too much. I tried to stop you but you won't listen. Hahah~ and I would end up watching over you. You-chan isn't as troublesome as you are. Oh I wish you could spent time with You-chan.. you two would've been such good friends.. You-chan would cook something really nice and your dish happens to be very spicy.. then you'll feel sorry for yourself and... I have to deal with you.. but all in good fun. I miss you, Mae-chan.."

I again wipe my tears and give the two grave stone one last look.

"I wish I could've seen you two really happy together.. married.. such a perfect couple you two were.. Good bye, Haro, Mae-chan. I'll visit when I can."

I've been working part time a few years ago as well. I've saved up to buy myself a nice bike. It makes traveling places a lot more easier and I get to ride with You-chan.

You-chan has a bike of her own. So we would ride together at national parks, trail ways, and neighbourhoods.

Although this bike has been only my big purchase. Costing me about $300 and really I've been just saving up for the past few years.

I can go on a few vacation trips, but I wanna wait a few more years so me and You-chan can go without much parental supervision.

I'm only 20 and still.. traveling at this age? I need a few more years to really think like an adult and get a good grasp on everything.