Blind Love

Chapter One- The big scary world

TRIGGER WARNING

Chapter One- The Big Scary World.

Lila’s POV:

Trigger warning if you are not comfortable with the talk and description of self harm please skip italicized section. Thank you!!
2:33 PM- 
“You’re not good enough!” I screamed at myself. “Why can’t you be normal!” “Siri, I can’t do this anymore,” I said to my phone. “How do I kill myself” I asked her. She asked me if she could call the suicide hotline. I said no…
I found my razor and listened to a tutorial on how to get a blade out of it. I told myself goodbye. Or I guess hello, I would be spending the rest of my life (or non-life) with myself. “Siri text Barlow: Bye, I love you” I said. I gripped the blade as hard as I could and pointed the sharp corner into my skin. I pushed down as far as I could go without screaming. I wanted to scream. But I couldn’t. I wouldn’t show the devil my weakness… myself. Even though this is what I’m going through, I’m a strong believer in Christianity. I knew how much of a sin this was. But I knew that God loved me, and he would forgive me if I asked. So right there, in that very moment, I prayed. I prayed to God that I wouldn’t go to hell. And as I was praying, I was also shoving a razor blade across my arm. Then another time, and another. Once my arm was full of cuts I moved to my thigh, halfway through my thigh, I started to get dizzy. I knew myself, I was going to pass out. So, I moved the blade away from my face immediately. That was all I knew...

Barlow’s POV:

2:42 PM-
“Get your cats on the wax paper,” Mrs Ohlinger said. She is our science teacher. It’s so gross, but in science we’re dissecting cats. I slid my cat out of the bag it was in onto the wax paper we were working on. “Ewwww I hate this, it’s sooo gross! And I hate this group!” Marco said in her sassy voice. She hated the group because she had just got cheated on by this kid Coltino, and now she has a huge crush on me, but obviously I don’t want to date her. The rest of our group was the kids everyone hated. I felt bad for them, so we had a secret thing where we would make fun of Marco’s crush on me. Mrs. Ohlinger began talking again, “So, does everyone ha-” My phone cut her off. Of course, my phone just had to go off right when Mrs. Ohlinger was talking. “Barlow Rasmussen!” She shouted. “Check your phone and then put it on SILENT!” We were technically allowed to have our phones, according to the school, but Mrs. O didn’t really follow that. I checked, and it was Lila. I knew she wasn’t coming to school because she texted me and told me she needed a “me day”. The text I just got said, “Bye, I love you” I told Mrs. Ohlinger that I felt sick and needed to go to the nurse, I told her that my mom just told me that “if you still don’t feel good I should go to the nurse, even though it is the last period of the day. I don’t want you getting sick on the way home.” She let me go and I went to the office and told them I needed to leave, it was an emergency. I left the building before they could respond. I went in my car and started driving to the middle school to pick up Anthony and see if he knew anything. Sure enough they wouldn’t let me in the school, so I started driving to Lila’s house. In the car the whole time I was texting and calling her. (Yes I know it’s illegal, but it was for my girl, and I care about her).

Anthony’s POV:

3:07 PM-
“Hey Anthony, it's almost your bus stop, get ready to run away from the big scary world like normal.” Carter Laughed “STOP IT Carter, you don’t know what's going on at home.” Carol shouted “Thanks Carol your right he has no idea...my sister-I mean… nevermind.” It’s my bus stop, time to run home and check on Lila. I walk into the house and yell out her name. No answer so I yell again, no answer. What's going on? I look all around the house then… I found her in the bathroom on the ground PASSED OUT. I looked at her phone and it was a youtube video on how to remove the blade from a razor then I saw Barlow had texted her 34 times and called her 52 times. I read the messages. And I see the message. Then I see the razor bloody as hell. I scream then call my dad who says to call 9-1-1 so I do.