Of the Twisted and the Lost

EPILOGUE:

Sera Chang's feelings come in colors brighter than normal as she dashes across the street, her sneakers slapping against the wet cement. 

The always-dancing red of a flame. The never-ending blue of an ocean. The twisting shade of silver because life sucks, life sucks, life will always suck for Sera. 

Tears stick onto her lashes, the Taiwanese girl gasping for air, veering sharply to the side. Her footsteps are light, the only sign of Sera is the slightly flattened dewy grass, her shadow flitting under the moonlight. 

Then she's flinging the door open, barging into her house, a mix of rain and tears doused on her. 

"Sera!" Nyleve gasps, glancing up from the couch. "Why are you home so soon? I thought you were at Avelyn's—" 

"I wasn't feeling well," Sera mumbles. "I'm going to bed early. Goodnight, Nyleve." 

"Goodnight," returns Nyleve, voice filled with uncertainty. 

Before Sera can escape upstairs, Nyleve says, "Oh, I almost forgot. There's mail for you." 

Sera murmurs a quick "thanks" as her stepmother passes on an envelope. She walks upstairs,  feeling the tightening in her stomach finally releasing. 

You're alone. You're fine. 

Shoving open her bedroom door, Sera sits back onto her bed. Her tears have dried and now that Sera thinks about it, the outburst at Avelyn's sleepover definitely wasn't necessary. 

But whenever her mind gets transported back to him. . . 

Sera's lips purse. Don't think about him, she chants. You're alone. You're fine. 

But from his ocean-blue eyes to his tawny brown curls. . . 

Don't. 

. . . to his lips curled into a beautiful smile that somehow always makes Sera's heartbeat go erratic. . . 

Think. 

. . . to his mouth that kissed her before, roller coasters of emotions dashing through the girl. . . 

About. 

. . . to his whole personality, always knowing, so clever yet so stupid in a way that makes Sera want to cry. . .

Him. 

Sera won't ever forget him. 

Because once upon a time, the girl fell in love with a boy named Junjie. 

It doesn't get better. Each day that passes, Sera misses him. It's been two years — yet every single week, day, minute, second, her mind is on him. 

Everyone else had closure with Junjie. They all knew he was dead and never coming back. So why couldn't Sera do the same? To forgive him for dying so early? 

Because you love him, a tiny part of her whispers. Even when he broke your heart. 

Sera hugs herself before her gaze falls onto the letter. You have to forget about him. Get up, Sera. Go on with normal life. With a sigh, Sera tears open the envelope. 

Then a tiny gasp escapes her. 

It's a letter written in all lower-caps, the handwriting neat and precise.