Want It All: Billie Eilish x Reader Female

Everything you wanted

I laid on my bed covered in blankets and hugging my body pillow. Why the fuck did I spaz out like that ? I thought to myself as I heard a knock on my door. "Knock knock" a voice said.

" go away Stella" I said under my covers. I didn't have the motivation to get up and open the door. honestly I didn't want anyone to come in here and see me in the state, My eyes were puffy and red , My cheeks and nose were bright pink and I Couldn't stop breathing hard. Do you know that moment when you're done crying and you're just trying to breathe but it's like a double breath?

"Billie's still here...... she wants to see you" she speak softly, I can imagine I have a smile on her face and a pity look in her eyes. I don't answer her, I can hear footsteps fading away. It's silent for a few moments until I hear another knock.

"Jaylee..." A sweet voice for my ears, A small smile appeared on my face. " can I come in please" she says.

"It's open." I say softly but loud enough for her to hear. I heard the door creek open and shut, then footsteps coming closer to me, and felt Billie sit at the end of the bed and place a hand on my leg, which sent chills down my spine.

"Jaylee, I'm really sorry about everything that happened in the past. Q was being a dick and I'm sorry he said all that shit" she apologizes. My smile widens, her words mean so much to me, I've never heard somebody care like this for me. I removed the covers to see and silver haired goddess. her chains reaching to her chest, the way her silver rings lay onto her fingers making her hands look sexy as fuck, a green bandanna wrapped around her forehead bring out her blue eyes which were gorgeous.

"Let's go to the roof" I say as I climb out the bed and grab her hand and run out to the window. We climbed out and sat on the roof.

It was pitch dark outside but the bright light of the moon shined onto Billie's beautiful pale face. I took a deep breath before I told her everything.

BILLIE

"so when I overdosed, I was in the hospital for five days. On the first night, my ex boyfriend, Jayden, came to see me." she spoke carefully, I knew this was a fragile topic by the way her body grew tense.

"he told me that it was my fault..." her voice cracked, I looked up to see tears in the brim of her eyes. "it was my fault that I overdosed, he said that I should've came home early and it wouldn't have happened." she looked down. That dick, I swear to god, who would ever even think about hurting this perfect angel.

"Jaylee, I'm so sorry" was all I could say, It's crazy to think something would happen to girl like Jaylee. I grabbed her hand and stroked it with my thumb, I felt her squeeze my hand which sent goosebumps all over my body and my cheeks burning, I smiled and squeezed back. I watched as she took a deep breath, signaling she was about to speak.

"that night after he visited, I had a dream that I got everything I wanted" she spoke quietly.

"Well that's good right? I mean I would love to get everything I-"

"It's not what you think bil" she cuts me off sadly. "Well what's it like then baby.." I said before I squeezed her hand again. "I was on the golden state bridge and I got this......feeling, I can't explain it but it made me step off" she sniffles as she looks down in shame.

Chills went down my spine imagining Jaylee killing herself, I took my free hand and placed it on her chin to turn her head facing me. "Jaylee it's okay it was just a-"

"I was dead Billie! A-a-and nobody cried, n-nobody body notice. I-I'm so stupid to think they might care but no one does. N-no one b-Billie" she broke out into a full on sob.