you said you won't leave

•9•

[The next morning]

"You ready?" Layla asks as we get in the car.

"Give me a few minutes," I say. "And then I'll be ready."

She nods her head and walks out of my bedroom. I walk to my window and I close my eyes as I try and fight back the tears.

I open my eyes back up and I stare at the tree that I used to always climb at night. I always climbed trees with my dad, but now he's gone and we don't do that anymore. I wish we still could.

I pull out my phone and I hit Caleb's name. Right as the phone starts ringing I start to cry. I try to hold it back though because I don't want him to know. He can't know yet.

"Hey, baby girl!" He says all excited. I fucking hate myself for doing this to him.

"Hi," I say quietly.

"What's the plan for today? Do you have any ideas?" The tears are now strolling down my face and I loudly start to cry. I know that he is going to ask now. "Baby, what's going on?"

"Nothing. I'm okay," I lie. "But, uhm. I-I can't hang today."

"Baby. I know that you are lying," he says.

"I'm fine," I lie again. "But uhm, just know that I love you, okay? And I mean that more than anything."

"Why are you saying this shit? And why are you crying? What's going on, Nyai?"

"Nothing," I say. "It doesn't even matter anymore. Just remember me. Remember that I love you."

"Nyai, stop saying that shit. You are scaring me," he says. "What's going on?"

The tears keep coming down my face because I know this is the last time he will talk to me. This is the last time he will say he loves me. This is the last of it all.

"I'm sorry, Caleb. I'm really sorry."

"For what? Nyai, stop this or I'm going to come over. Talk to me."

"You can't come over," I say. "I'm leaving with my family. I won't be here, but I just needed to tell you that I love you."

"Nyai."

"No, Caleb. Stop asking questions. Just please listen to me."

"Okay," he whispers.

"Remember when I asked you if you would forgive the person that hurt you so much?"

"Yes."

"Well you said that you would like to think you would forgive them," I say.

"What does this have to do with anything?"

"Just please try and forgive me."

"From what, baby? None of this makes any sense," he says.

"I-It all will in an hour or so," I say. "But please don't forget about me."

"I would never."

I close my eyes and I bite my lip so hard to keep myself from breaking apart right now, "I-I l-love you, C-Caleb." My voice breaks completely as I say those last words.

"I love you more," he says for the last time.

(a/n: ngl i'm fr bawling^^)

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