Pages of life

He is Gone

He is gone, and I mean from gone is he is now in the place where he truly belong, to the other side of the world.

Having him in my life was amazing, he made me feel special and loved, he is the first person to have the courage to enter and try to come in my whole world.

He did try to  fully know me and to climb the wall that I built to protect myself and my heart, I never knew that someone really wanted to get to know me, yes me, my personality, my culture and my soul, but I guess the wall that I build was too high.

The first time I really decided if I will let him in my life, and I did, I let him in. And that is one of the best decision that I have made.

He said he likes me, he said he is falling for me, he said he is inlove with me, he said he loves me.

But I guess his love for me can easily be wipe or fade away, and me starting to fall inlove with him was the best, I never experienced such thing in my whole life.

Having a man that is so eager to get to know me, take me out on a date, ask me to be his girl is plainly so amazing and adorable.

I love everything about him, his smile, his eyes, his body, his humour, his flowery words, his matured thinking, his childishness, his scent, his personality, him, I love him, and I loved him.

But maybe we are not meant for each other, maybe it is not God's will.

   For you, I did understand that we are not meant for each other, I understand that you have to find someone to like and to love and to have.

We see each other daily and I see it in your eyes that when you look at her, you are happy, I know that look, that look is also the way you looked at me before.

It hurts you know, it hurts that I know and I see it and it breaks me, but I have nothing to do with it than to accept it and be happy for you, because you deserved it.

It was sad everytime memories flashback and my heart start feeling so sad.

And seeing her evrytime it gives me mixed emotions, happy for her, hurt, and at same time telling her in my mind that she was so blessed to have you and your attention.

I guest I have to see it in front of my eyes, I have to endure. And I guess I have succeeded, I accepted it, moved forward and happy for you.

But don't ever forget I never regretted having you in my life, maybe now there are things that can't easily go back to the way it was or maybe it will never going to be the way it used to be but we have to accept changes, there is changes everytime.

And I'm ready about it, nope, I am now into it. So wherever you are right now, I hope and pray for you always to be happy and may God blesses you with all the good thing that you deserve.

And maybe one thing that I regretting right now is that I never said 'I love you' but really I did love you, now let me tell you this, I loved you and I still do, ofcourse you are my friend, you already occupied space here in my heart. I will never forget you, no way on earth that I will forget about you.