XueXiao: When the Stardust Settles

Chapter One

"Let's go home now." Xiao Xingchen turned to Xue Yang who held their basket of vegetables. The frost of the morning was just starting to melt by the day sun- winter was ending soon. It couldn't come soon enough for the roaming cultivator who shook from every passing breeze. Without even meaning to, Xiao Xingchen walked closer to the stranger he had picked up almost a month ago. Back then, he didn't run nearly as warm, completely broken and battered. But now he was a healed man with a proud stature and most importantly right now, he functioned as a hearing source for the half-frozen Xingchen.
___

The air was always a little different in Yi City, a soiled quality of sorts. It didn't hurt their lungs but something hung in the air. The bodies of puppets were moved by the stranger so that Xiao Xingchen could roam freely, was what he told him. The reality was far more twisted- making sure to move the bodies to ensure the cultivator wouldn't realise the deception too quickly. That wouldn't be fun. Spoiling surprises is no fun. And my, my, what a surprise it'll be! Xue Yang felt his heartbeat in anticipation imagining the look of horror in the stupid vagrant's mind. Fitting treatment for a failure he thought, being broken and left alone. It wasn't that Xue Yang perceived Xiao Xingchen as a failure but he knew that Xiao Xingchen thought of himself that way. It was evident by the ways he tossed and turned at night in their little house. How he could hear him chanting apologies to his sect leader or watch the blood drip from his eyes and stain the cloth draped over them. Xue Yang found it hysterical. Crying was so habitual to the stupid cultivator that he cried without tears in his sleep.

In his most pure and open self.

Xiao Xingchen would allow himself to weep at the grave of his perceived failures, never fully grieving the loss of his future that he planned. His risk ate away at his heart, little by little until it was sore and raw until now where he can only weep with the empty space behind his eyelids.

Xue Yang found it hysterical.
___

Xiao Xingchen walked out with a teapot held in his hands and broke Xue Yang out of his thoughts. He sat on the rickety chair they found inside the abandoned house and surveyed the tea, pouring both Xiao Xingchen and himself a cup full. The space filled with swirls of jasmine scents.

"Is this the tea you bought today Daozhang?"

Xiao Xingchen nodded and smiled slightly before sitting down himself and taking a long breath in of the teacup in his hands.

"Jasmine tea was always my favourite."

He didn't utter it but thought 'who cares?' before taking a sip. Nothing special. For Xiao Xingchen it was a reminder of the past for when the days were bright and the nights were warm. Small things like the fragrance of tea eased a beaten heart.

"Do you ever spill?" Xue Yang questioned him after intently observing him.

"I used to but you can only break so many cups until you learn. Replacing them became too expensive to fumble around." His whole life very suddenly became fumbling around in the dark. But time is a masterful teacher. When he reaches out now, he will gather in his hands what is needed and won't spill a drop.
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When the night comes it's always without much pretence, just naturally arrives at their front door and allows itself to stay. It always carries a silence with it an unnerving awkwardness. There was only one bed so both Xiao Xingchen and Xue Yang had to share it. Xue Yang couldn't help but recall the first night he stayed in the dilapidated dorm.

...

"I suppose I can make a bed on the floor so you can heal your injuries better. Sleep doesn't mitigate pain unless that sleep is comfortable."

Xue Yang had to save face, he wasn't going to be allowed to be treated like a delicate maiden on her first night away from home.

"Daozhang, while I know your humility is important and that kindness flows like rivers from you, I won't allow you to sleep on the cold floor."

That's what others would say in this situation right? False concern for the wellbeing of the other? He just wanted to keep up his own reputation, even if it was just for himself.

"We will share the bed but I can decide who sleeps where. Is that a fair compromise?"

"Well, yes, I suppose that's fair if that's what you want to do, friend."

"Great. Then Daozhang, you'll sleep next to the wall and I'll be on the free edge."

He only nodded in response but couldn't help but question as to why this strange man wanted it to be like this?

Even in a heart so blackened, there was still a part that bloomed with goodness and that part whispered a concern in Xue Yang's ear, 'What if he falls off? This way he'll be safe'. Xue Yang convinced himself it was out of selfishness- to keep a provider around.

...

Xiao Xingchen came back from bathing himself and laid down next to the wall as he had been doing for weeks. Despite being called "daozhang", he was still unable to quiet his thoughts from time to time and couldn't help but wander into fantasies he would carry into his sleep. Tonight was an echo of the previous few nights in which his mind would shamefully wander to the silhouette of the stranger. This figure was just there, nothing too particular, but the visage had a beautiful smile directed towards the dreamer. Silent exchanges of affection like holding hands or combing hair. Even though the man was in good health, he had stayed and Xiao Xingchen could never exactly place why he made that choice. That thinking sent him down avenues to explore but his favourite one to dwell on was companionship. Two broken men had found one another, could it really be that simple? Of course, he had thoughts and questions of the stranger's motives that aired on the grim side but they were always whisked away. Maybe the string of fate pulled them to each other? He felt a dip in the mattress when the other man sat down and put his hair up for the evening while Xiao Xingchen pretended to be asleep. The stranger pulled the blankets over them both and tucked the edges around Xiao Xingchen before laying down. His heartfelt as though it swelled and cheeks flushed with warmth from the gesture. Soon, he heard the other softly snoring. Even this soothed his soul, just the confirmation he was alive and well and here- next to him. Small things eased a beaten heart.