The Queens' Baby

Ch. 11 - Wants

Savannah POV

It's been a couple days since the incident and I'm still pretty back and forth on being little and being big. I'm going to talk to Peyton and Jason when they're out of headspace to see if they can help me figure out things I will like versus things I won't or what I'd like to try.

All the littles are getting ready to play together in the play room while Alex's sister Danielle watches us. I haven't gotten to spend much time with her yet, so I don't know how much I really like her.

"Hey guys? Before you fully regress, can I talk to you both about something important?" I ask Peyton and Jason as we sit on the floor.

"What's up Savvy?" Peyton asked causing me to quirk an eyebrow at her. She uses that name while she's little typically.

"If you're feeling little right now it's okay. We can talk about it later." I tell her truthfully.

Now she looks confused. "What? No, I like calling you Savvy over Savannah big and little. What's up?"

I nodded my head and looked to Jason who just shrugged. "Okay, well I'm struggling to figure out what my headspace is. Addie and Alex want to help me by me trying out different things to see if I like it or not, but I don't even know where to start. So I was wondering if you two could help me out?"

"Of course Savannah. Let's start with basic comfort items. There's stuffed animals, pacifiers, and blankets just to name a few. Certain clothing items can be a comfort item as well. Did you bring something to write this all down?" Jason asked and I nodded showing him my pen and paper.

"Addie lets me sleep in her nightgowns sometimes and I really like that, would that count?" I ask and receive two head nods.

"Okay so I'll write down that I like that, should I put that I want to try the others as well?" I ask.

"Yeah, definitely. What's your favorite animal? You could ask for a stuffie that is that animal. And make sure you ask for a super soft blanket, maybe in your favorite color?" Peyton replied.

"Okay, so I should write down pacifiers, an elephant stuffie, and a navy soft blanket?" I ask receiving more head nods.

"I uh, also wear a pull-up when I sleep. Should I put that on there so they know I'm okay with it?" I ask quietly since I was embarrassed about it.

"Yep, there's also another comfort thing, it's not really an item. I do it, and Jason only does it when he's upset." Peyton said looking to Jason who seemed unsure.

"Are you sure you should bring that up Pey?" Jason asked concerned.

"She might as well know ahead of time in case Addie or Alex want it too. At least she'll know what it is." Peyton fired back at him.

I just kind of sat there, "Uh you guys realize I'm still here right. Just tell me already!"

Peyton hesitated, I guess conflicted after Jason's concerns. "Breastfeeding or nursing is also a comfort item." I was not expecting that and could feel my face flush.

Peyton continued, "It was something I had been interested in at the beginning and Lillian, my mommy was too. At first we just started out with dry nursing and then we decided to try wet nursing, which we still do. Jason didn't want to at first, but there are times when skin on skin just wasn't enough for him so he nursed to calm down. He doesn't have a problem with it, but he was generally pretty calm."

I squirmed a little where I was sitting, "I don't know how I feel about that. I would be too embarrassed to bring it up."

Jason nodded, "I get that. So maybe ask for skin to skin? If that makes you feel better, you could breech the topic of dry nursing and go from there. You don't have to worry about what Alex and Addie will think though. They are both super understanding, and if they aren't up for it they'll tell you, but they won't think you're gross or anything."