Precious Sins ✓

Chapter 41: Colour Me Red

TW: Talk of Suicide (Adrien's POV) & Physical Violence (Preston's POV)

Precious Sins

Chapter XLI: Colour Me Red

[Adrien's POV]

I stopped going to school.

I didn't go to school for the rest of the week, didn't bother to crawl out of bed, and because I failed to put in the effort to get out of bed and do things, my mom was starting to worry. I told her that I just wasn't feeling well, but she still expressed her concerns. Luckily, she hadn't found out about the cuts on my wrists, because I have been making sure to wear long sleeves and hoodies to keep it hidden from her.

I didn't like that she was starting to catch on, but honestly, I didn't have the heart to care anymore. It was tiring trying to get up and go on with my day, while my friends ignored me, and while the rest of my senior classmates gossiped and spread rumours about me.

It terrified me not knowing if Marci spread the rumours she threatened to spread, but at the same time, I didn't care anymore. There wasn't much I could do to stop it, so I just didn't do anything. If anything, she could spread the rumours if she wanted to, because I wasn't going to be there to hear it.

I didn't bother to do my schoolwork, to paint or draw, to shower, to brush my teeth, to change out of my clothes, to eat. What was the point of it all anymore? I didn't see any point in it anymore.

"Adrien, sweetheart?" My mom called out from outside my bedroom door, knocking gently. When I heard the bedroom door slowly open, the light of the hallway seeping into my dark room, I rolled over on my bed, back facing the door. Mom's footsteps wandered into my room, and soon, I felt her presence at my bedside, her hand touching my shoulder.

"I'm heading into work soon, hun. Do you need anything before I go? Or do you want me to pick up anything on my way home from work?" She asked me, but I shook my head, not bothering to answer.

Mom sighed. She reached up to brush her fingers through my hair softly. The soothing gesture had me squeezing my eyes shut, forcing myself to hold back tears.

"Alright. I'll be home by 6 pm. I love you, sweetie," She stroked my hair one last time before she leaned over and kissed my temple. Then, she was walking out of my room, closing the door behind her.

A few minutes later, after my mom had gone to work, I grabbed my phone off the nightstand to check the time. It was only 10:30 am. I sighed heavily, shut my phone off, and rolled onto my back to stare up at the dark ceiling.

I hated feeling like this. I hated being sad all the time. I missed Preston; I missed the way he held me when we cuddled, the way he touched me when we were intimate, and the way he kissed me, whether it was on my lips, or my forehead, or my cheek. I missed his smile. His laughter. His personality. I just missed him.

Ten years we spent as best friends, just to throw it all away because we thought we could make a relationship work. I thought I could have what I wanted, and what I wanted was Preston, but now I was facing the consequences for having what I wanted. Why? Why didn't I deserve to have what I wanted? Why did everyone else get to have happy endings? Why did everyone else get to have friends, their dream job, a lover, without people bashing on them, and not me?

I guess I deserved it, for trying to be a little selfish. I deserved to be punished for liking Preston, for even exploring the possibility of a relationship with him. I deserved to be punished for thinking about a future with him, where we would be married with children. I deserved to be forced on my Carter, to be belittled by my classmates, to be shunned by my friends because I didn't deserve any of it.