Dumb requests

Circuits and Wires

DOC ANGST!
Request number 3/4 I believe... Unless you have any more dude? Because I'd be more than happy to write it! <3
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"Yeah, thanks Bdubs." Doc sighed. "No problem!" Bdubs smiled as both men made their way from half-house to half-house, Doc receiving help from Bdubs as he needed to move a lot of stuff for a major project. It had been a long day of work and they had just finished. 

He went to open the door before Bdubs yelped. Doc turned. 

"What?" 

Bdubs looked at him. "I was tryna hug ya man!" 

Doc looked at him before realizing it was because of his metal side. "Oh uhm.. sorry.?" 

"Nah, your fine Doc!" 

Bdubs held out his arms as a 'try-again' and Doc simply side hugged him, not wanting to have to open the door again. He hadn't even realized that Bdubs had left until he heard the door close. 

He sighed and walked in, not even wincing as his arm- his metal arm- hit the door frame. He just sighed as he walked into the backyard, swatting away the bugs attacking his arm. 

Arm. Noun. 

Each of the two upper limbs of the human body from the shoulder to the hand.

Doc stretched out his arm. Arm. No 's.' 

He sighed and sat down on the couch, quietly fixing out the kinks and not feeling a thing. On his metal arm at least.

The metal arm that he was known for. The metal arm that was 'oh-so-great-!' The metal arm.

He sighed as he sat down and thought of everything that was, compared to what it is.

He missed touch. He missed those annoying nudges Ren would give him. He missed pain. He missed being able to feel. All those itsy bugs. All those once-missed hugs. Seeing things normally. 

The time he spent yearning for his limbs back was ridiculous. 

He stood to go make some coffee, but tripped over some redstone.

Yet again earths' reminder of him being a walking computer.

Every since that day, he had taken to redstone. It kept him distracted, and became progressively easier as his robotic eye showed all the math for him, and his metal arm taking most of the damage. 

Not like he felt it anyways. He didn't feel much these days for the matter. All he was able to focus on was trying to find something normal. But somehow his metal parasites were apart of everything. His life. His new life. As a freak.

What was once flesh and bone, now circuits and wires. What was an eye, now a holographic blueprint. A distant feeling, pain, slowly faded as every day his mind slowly ran numb. His life, now one of metal. Tripping and ripping skin, now simply a dent to the arms' grey shell. Once normal skin, now an inky green and black. Formerly a genius, now a robot. Previously feared with respect, now feared by intimidation. A happy personality, now, one that shuts down and bites. Once a friend, what now, nobody truly knows. 

Once a man, now shattered glass. Once a friend, now a shadow. Once feelings, not a bland nothingness. Once pain, now a blunt obliteration. Nobody would understand this feeling. Being an outcast. A freak. A mistake. A piece of metal. You never know what's going on behind closed compartments. Used to be a selfless person who was content with friends, now wanting one thing, one thing again. He wanted what he felt, what he knew, he wanted what was missing. Emotionally. Physically. Theoretically.

He wanted to be human.

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He missed feeling human.
He missed the felt hugs.
He missed the feeling of those tiny bugs.

He wished for normal vision, 
But was met with a statistics collision.

He forgot about fear, and faked his pride.
After that day, his comments turned snide.

He always thought of the days when his mission was to live through the night,
But now he walked on, ignored by the creatures of green and blue atomic light.

Hermits thought him a friend, he thought himself a foe.
What he went through, nobody would know.

Darkness and sorrow quickening his stride, he never seemed to shake the pain and memories inside.
Once loving day, he was forced to night.
The things he would give to feel normal one last time.

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