𝐁𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐃 𝐉𝐔𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐄 ↛ 𝑫𝑨𝑹𝑬𝑫𝑬𝑽𝑰𝑳

⥓ 𝟎𝟎

"I remember, back when I was a kid, I used to love watching old crime dramas--you know, like Hill Street Blues, Perry Mason, things like that.  I remember watching them so intently, figuring out each case before they'd reveal who did it.  You'd just laugh because you had already seen all the episodes back when it'd first aired... You already knew who did it, but you never wanted to tell me, said I'd eventually figure it out on my own--which was true.  I never knew why you found that funny, but I guess looking back at it, an eight year old trying to keep up with a team of lawyers would seem pretty humorous...not to mention the fact that I was probably wrong about each case at least a dozen times.  By time I'd actually 'solved' it, the show would be nearly over and the final piece would fall into place.  Still, I thought I was pretty good at it.  Good enough to the point where I couldn't imagine a life where I didn't pursue law when I grew up.

"But all those shows and movies, they didn't tell you what it would really be like.  I mean sure, I get that sometimes they might take out what could be considered boring or just not include whatever wasn't important to the story; cut out what might put them over for time.  But I wish they hadn't...because now I'm stuck.  Not stuck in the way you might think, but stuck in the way that I don't know what to do.  The people I work for--they're meant to be good.  They're nice enough, at least, but...that doesn't justify what they do.  I thought public service was meant to be pure.  I mean, it's not hard to see why.  Cops and lawyers--pretty much anyone with access to the law and to stand by the law...they're meant to be the ones protecting the innocent and defending their rights, not trying to take them away.  Never once did I think that the people I'm trying to protect--the people I associate with, that I let into my home--were killers.

"I don't mean that in the way that they've killed someone, that a threat was made and they did the right thing by putting them down.  If that was the case, then I'm a killer, too.  But I never once did it out of pure...evil, out of rage.  I did it because I was told that if I didn't that good people would suffer.  I listened to the people meant to protect this city and have watched what they've become.  They're not trying to bring justice to these people, they're trying to use their position to scare them into doing things they can't--but that doesn't make them innocent.  In no way does that justify what I've done.  Because of them, I've got blood on my hands.  Because of them...the one person I had left is dead."

Through blurry eyes, Daniella gazed down at her mother's gravestone, heart heavy and her form filled with sadness.  Looking at the engraved dates, anyone could see that Susan Maria Fischer had a long life left to live.  It was only cut short after a brutal attack meant as a threat to Daniella ended her life all together.  To this day, Daniella blames herself for her mother's death.  There was no way for her to be forgiven when the one person she needed to hear it from was dead.

"I can never forgive myself for what I did to you.  It was my fault...all of it.  And no matter what I do, I can't get over this feeling that I didn't try!  I didn't try hard enough for you!  Because of what I did, I won't ever be able to see you just one more time." With a suppressed sob, Daniella collapsed onto the ground above where her mother's body lied.  She rested one arm onto her tombstone and cried into her elbow while her other arm remained stiff by her side, a single rose in her hand with her knuckles clenched tightly around it.  Every week, Daniella came to this cemetery and every week, she did the same thing.  Instead of mourning what she'd lost, she blamed herself for what had happened.  After all, the brain registers the most severe pain being experienced and blocks out the others.  In Daniella's case, she won't be able to properly mourn her mother's death until she's presented with the closure she's needed for the past year--ever since the day she lost her mother in what her file said was a 'botched robbery'.

After several minutes, the woman was finally able to collect herself and come to a stand, looking down at the grave numbly.  She had a feeling her mother wouldn't like the next words to come out of her mouth, even if in the end she would appreciate her for what she did.  Daniella tugged at the end of her blazer as if that would relieve it of the wrinkles it had gained from the long day she had at the station writing up police reports for the people she was forced to have as colleagues.  "Though I blame myself for getting you into that position, I'm still not the one who pulled that trigger.  It may have been me who caused it to happen, but I didn't kill you.  The people who did this...they're still out there.  They haven't been condemned because of who they work for.  They can afford to cover up your death.  And it was their mistake to think that I would play along."

Reaching out, Daniella placed the damaged rose down on top of her mother's gravestone.  The familiar metallic smell of blood flew through the air as the substance ran down her fingers from the thorns.  "They think they have power over this city, but they won't for long.  I will stop them.  No matter what, I will find the person that did this."  Daniella gave the stone one last touch, as though it were her mother standing before her again.  She knew it wasn't, but it was the closest thing she would get to it.  "And no matter what..." she paused, giving the grave a final look before turning to leave the cemetery.

"I will make them pay."