White Lie

Chapter 5

The next morning, Kira gets dressed and heads to work as usual. The previous night was an eventful one in one way or another for sure, and he found himself fairly distracted for most of the day.

Her face, that expression. It kept coming back to him again and again. The amount of pain and yet, happiness, in her voice.

It was all becoming too much.
He had to hurry up and figure out what he was going to do.

"Hey Kosaku?"
It was a woman's voice, he turned around in his chair.

"The boss wanted me to drop these papers off to you, fill them out and then bring them over to his office."

"Thank you." And then he saw them, her hands. They were painted a dark red color, her skin looked so soft. He could just take her hand, it would be so easy, by now there was nobody left in the office except him and this woman-

No. Not yet. He was still under their radar, they could still potentially find out his identity. He tried to just focus on the paperwork, when she crossed his mind again. Not that woman,
Shinobu. He somehow feels bad about last night despite the fact that, the moment wasn't a negative one. It was one that they needed.
Wait, what did he mean by  they needed? He didn't need anything. Kosaku was the one who should've apologized to her a long time ago.

But none of this should be a concern to him at all.

As he unlocks the door to the house, it's silent. The lights are out, and his dinner is still on the table. And he doesn't feel like eating right now, so he puts it in the fridge and heads upstairs. Shinobu was sitting up in bed, reading a book.

"Hey Baby, when'd you get back home? Did you have a good day?"

He doesn't respond. He shouldn't.

"Are you okay?"

He doesn't want to answer her. He's just making things more difficult for himself. He has to focus on what's important, staying hidden.

"Well ... goodnight, I hope you sleep well." She puts the book down and shuts the light off. And they're silent. He doesn't face her the way he did the night before.

He can't look at her. Not anymore. It's what's best.

Then why did it hurt so badly. Why did he wish he'd said something. The next morning, why does he hate not even saying goodbye.

He was fitting into this mold, right after he'd apologized to Shinobu for Kosaku doing the exact same thing he's doing now.

Why'd he have to care so much.

After that, days seemed to go by that he forced himself into this silent treatment. He hated it, he knows Shinobu must be confused as to why he's gone so cold again.

Just a little longer, it's what's right.

But deep down something is telling him to go the other way, he wanted to shut it up so badly. He didn't care about her. He didn't.

"Kosaku, we need to talk. Please."
He feels the warm hand gripping his wrist, her hand, but he doesn't respond to it.

"Kosaku ... please talk to me. What happened? Where have you gone?"

He bites down hard on his lip, he wants to face her.
Don't do it.

"Let ... let go of me, I'm going to b-"
"Kosaku."
That voice, there's something stern in it. Shinobu wasn't going to let this go on any longer.
"Please talk to me, tell me what's wrong,"
"Shinobu, let go."
"No! I'm not going to let go of you until you tell me why you've gone back to avoiding me again!"
"I said, let go." He pulls his wrist from her grasp, and it hits him. How harsh he sounded. The pain and confusion on Shinobu's face hurts him, his insides hurt worse. He turns away, walking up the stairs, Shinobu's quiet sobs are like knifes sticking into his back.

This was what was best,

Right?

This was what he was supposed to do, wasn't it?

This is what he wanted. He wanted nothing more to do with her.

This was how it should be.

((A/N: sorry for post gap,, having some medical issues right now, I'll try getting back to you guys! Thank you to all the lovely people who read my story :)))