ikigai // b.e + a.r

꧁ thoughts // 2 ꧂

➪ karina's pov

i really only have one day left with my best friend.

 i'm literally so fucking nervous to be on my own. of course i'll be in florida for the majority of the summer, but i'm just so scared for what happens when i come back. 

💭💭💭

what if everything is different?

maybe something really big will happen to me. 

no. nothing ever happens to me. i have a mediocre life, what could possibly happen?

you never know.. you could meet anybody. maybe they'll mean a shit ton to you.

i doubt they will.

but they could.

say they do, i could fuck that relationship up. or a current one.

 but at the same time, there's a chance it would go just fine. you're thinking too much. why jump to conclusions when anything and everything could happen?

because, i can't get my hopes up too high. otherwise when something doesn't happen, i'll be devastated. heartbroken. nobody wants to deal with that.

but if they mean a ton to you, and you mean a ton to them; they'll help you pick up your pieces. they'll help rebuild you.

i guess. but what if-

no "what if's".  go with the flow. live life to the fullest.

💭💭💭

since it was my last day with my best friend, we did everything together. 

literally everything there was to do around here, we did. we went to the mall, saw our friend, walked around stores, went to the drive-in, took a few insta pics at the drive-in, everything.

before the night ended, we stopped to get milkshakes. something we always do every time she visits me. we went for a cruise in the back roads. blasting music, windows rolled down. the car was with filled with serotonin and the smell of maraschino cherries.

i wanted to do as much as i could with her before she leaves for jersey. we headed back to my place and her mom picked her up. we hugged goodbye for tonight.

tomorrow i go say goodbye to her at the airport. 

~

343 words. chapter 2. ♥︎