Misfit

Chapter One: Same ol' same ol'

I am nineteen and have two siblings. My older half brother Jackie who is twenty two, stopped going to college and is "between jobs" , as he calls it. Then there's my younger sister Bella who's eleven. I'm in highschool, second year of 12th grade and that alone had set the mood for the rest of my year... It sucks I know. I remember last year my parents pep talked me about not letting the fact that I had to repeat the grade get me down, I can't remember what it actually made me feel. My parents. I'm lucky that both are present and that's pretty much just it. Sucks that both are cheating on each other, at least they're still present. Somewhat. Jackie isn't home most of the time so he hasn't noticed, Bella... Well she's too young to understand it.

FLASHBACK -begin-

I've heard my mother speak with this mystery guy on more than one occasion. The way she speaks with him, she uses words that are unbecoming of a woman her age, she giggles like a highschool girl at the cheesy pick up lines he uses. She thinks I'm watching the TV when I'm actually just looking at it and not paying it any attention, feigning ignorance of their conversation. The first time I heard her speak with this guy I was in the kitchen trying to decide on what I would make for lunch. Maybe I stood there for so long that she thought I'd already went to my room again and that's when I heard his voice. I knew for a fact that it wasn't my father, he was never uses "Baby" when referring to my mother. I intentionally bumped my knee against the kitchen counter and that must've startled her. She practically fumbled around and dropped her phone in an attempt to end the call. She must've thought I was father. My dad on the other hand, he's just as guilty but bolder. He once brought his mystery woman home when mother was out of town with my aunt. A brunette with honey brown eyes. She was nice, too nice for my liking and unfortunately for me I was the only one home at the time. The brunette spent the night at our house.

I walk back to my room and that's where I am for the rest of my days. It's a pretty small room, the bed takes up majority of the space that's in here and there isn't much sunlight coming in. Jackie's oversized caravan is obstructing the sunlight from entering and my mother refuses to move the thing. My room is where I like to be, where I don't have to look at my mother's eyes. I could go outside but I don't have any friends, the guys my age are out there drinking, fucking and doing drugs. I don't want that for myself.

The other day, the school gave me a letter to deliver to my parents. Just like any other teenager, I first looked inside. I know myself too well, I was never one to get in trouble with the school, hell, I don't even have friends there anymore since they all left for college and I haven't bothered making any new ones either. "Are you kidding me?" I scoff as I crumble the formal piece of paper and let it fall to the gravel as I walk. The school is demanding money from my parents for some event that's going to take place later next month for the juniors. They are asking money from the very same people who are behind with their school fees by almost a year, they even threatened to take my parents to court if they don't pay their dues soon for crying out loud. A bit of guilt stabs me as I walk to the bus stop, it IS my fault they are behind payments... Right? I was the one who chose that school in the first place so it has to be.

As soon as I get home, I lie to my father about how my day has been. As if I'd tell him. I don't tell them anything about nothing, not about the letter either. I know damn well they couldn't afford that anyway, it's one of the reasons why I've never asked them for anything. The clothes I have, more than half are hand-me downs from my cousins and the rest were ones I bought myself last year when I worked part-time just to keep myself busy.

FLASHBACK-end-

I lie awake in the dead of the night, the one true time I resent. This is the time my thoughts run rampant and I know I can't have that, it'll ruin me.