𝕙𝕒𝕝𝕔𝕪𝕠𝕟 ; 𝕔𝕠𝕠𝕡𝕥𝕣𝕒𝕧 𝕠𝕟𝕖𝕤𝕙𝕠𝕥𝕤

the clouds came down and sat you in the front.

soft cooptrav bc im soft :)
this was an au inspired by lipsxipst !! dante i wrote your thing!
i hope you guys like it! <3

fic title from ;; medusa – szymon

cw/tw ;; brief mentions of anxiety

pairing ;; cscoop/traves

prompt ;; cooper hates online school and wants to drop out, but there’s one person he stays for. 

final word count ;; 1.28k

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college is hard enough when you're not stuck in a global pandemic, cooper can attest to that, because so far he's missed a good portion of his eight am class because he can't wake up early enough to join the zoom call, he's completely skipped a maths lecture because he forgot about it, and he still hasn't figured out the password for the finance lectures zoom calls. he’s four months into the school year and it seems as if the only good thing for him would be to just go ahead and drop out already.

and don’t get him wrong, he probably would’ve already dropped out if it weren’t for the cute, curly-haired brunet in his language arts class. he’s literally the only reason cooper’s staying in class, and if cooper has but a lick of a chance with him, he’ll stay all year.

an odd rush of emotions, mainly consisting of adorement and utter awe, fly through his head as soon as he lays eyes on the small square that shows his face, cheeks flushed and eyebrows furrowed, not unlike the first time he’s seen him. the tag in the bottom left corner reads travis lee, and cooper makes a mental note to remember that name, since he hasn’t been the last fifteen fucking times he’s sat and stared at travis for the entire lecture.

he glances at his own square, wincing as he takes a look at his reflection – he looks like actual shit, greasy blond hair plastered to his sweaty forehead, eyebags that look fucking designer weighing heavy under his eyes, and the blush that seems to be permanently residing on his face just makes him look sick. he props his head on his hand, letting his eyes close for a brief moment while the professor takes roll.

he waves at the screen once his name is called, shifting in his chair so his face is more visible, picking up his pencil and twirling it around his fingers. after the initial lecture, their work is posted and they’ve got the choice to remain in the call until finished (and since travis is staying, cooper stays). the assignment for the day is simple – write an essay about who you are and what you do and send it in. no biggie.

except it’s definitely a biggie.

cooper’s job is being a youtuber, and he’s completely shit at that. the only other things he does is simp for pretty, curly-haired brunets and skateboard, to be honest, since he’s not that big on going outside, unless he’s going to the skate park. he doesn’t know what the hell he’s supposed to write on the essay, since he certainly isn’t including specific information about himself, and he mutes his mic before groaning loudly and thumping his head against his table.

reluctantly, he opens a microsoft word document and begins writing, brushing hair from his face and tucking the locks behind his ear so they don’t fall into his face as he types. it takes him a few moments to gather everything he wants to write, revising in his head before he actually begins, starting off with the more  basic stuff – his name, his age, what classes he takes in uni, and everything is going relatively well.

that is, until travis starts humming softly along to his music, swaying his head side to side as he types. cooper’s poor, gay heart can’t take it, but he can’t keep his eyes off the sight of the brunet absolutely vibing. it’s legitimately adorable, he’s red-faced and unabashedly staring and holy shit, travis is staring back, his happy facial expression twisting to one of embarrassment. cooper glances away, looking at the other squares of people, but they aren’t paying a lick of attention, and he gets an idea.

sorry for staring, you’re just really cute. he holds up the piece of paper, watching as travis’s eyes scan over the messily scrawled words, chubby cheeks flushing a dark red and the embarrassed smile melding into a dorky grin. cooper drops the paper back onto the desk and scribbles my name is cooper :) on it, holding it up and smiling back at the brunet.

travis dips his head and the blond frowns slightly, wondering if travis is upset or something; he sighs and sits back in his chair, tapping gently at his desk in confusion. he nibbles at his bottom lip, eyes downcast and brows furrowed, tonnes of thoughts racing through his head, and a soft hum snaps him out of it before he can get too far in confusion and wondering what he’s done wrong. travis is holding up a piece of paper with a username on it, the familiar four numbers belonging to a discord tag behind it, and cooper smiles widely, scribbling it down on another piece of paper so he can add the other man later.

for now, he doesn’t write anything else to travis, simply content with having the information he already does, and continues to work on his essay. he’s almost a thousand words in, scratching his head in thought. personal goals is what’s required next, and for this, he stops.

what are his personal goals? it’s not something he’s ever really thought about, too concerned with school and his job to actually stop and think. it takes him a while to think up something, and once it forms in his brain, he instantly takes to typing it.

one of my personal goals is to start getting out more, interacting with others more. i want to meet new people, to connect with someone that’s not my roommate. anxiety always tends to get the best of people, making them overthink and doubt themselves, and it’s something i myself haven’t been able to get past. i want to break free from racing hearts and scrambled thoughts, from chewing on fingers and biting the insides of cheeks, drumming fingers on desks and tight chests and the feeling of not being able to breathe, i want to be free. free to do my own thing without double-thinking and feeling as if i’d regret it when i’m done. it’s kind of like skateboarding, in a sense; i always feel free of burden and responsibility when i’m on a board, i always feel like i can be myself without anyone judging me when i skate, and it’s honestly my main outlet. i guess my main goal is to learn how to free myself from unneeded self-judgement.

wow. that got a little deep.

cooper huffs a laugh and runs a hand through his hair, closing his document and saving so he can turn it in later. his hands are shaking, he belatedly realises, and his eyes are teary and he probably looks like he’s about to fucking cry. he glances at his computer screen to see travis’s concerned gaze directed towards him, and he shakes his head and smiles.

he supposes the first thing he should do to work towards his goal is to add travis on discord, instead of procrastinating because what if he doesn’t like me? what if he gets to know me a little more and decides it’s not worth it? he’s kind of tired of being scared.

fingers fly across his keyboard, quickly tapping in the username and four digit tag after; the friend request is sent with one final click of his mouse. it’s done. he’s sent it. he leaves the lecture’s zoom call and sits back in his chair, eagerly awaiting the discord message he knows travis will send to him eventually.

somewhere, deep in his mind, he hopes travis will be the one to set him free.