Take My Magic For Your Routine

Chapter 5

When Hans returned from work late that night, everything was as usual. Aldo entered his dog-house at once and lied down. He looked around him. The night sky was heavy with stars and the moon lit it. Crickets sounds came from everywhere. In front of the house shone a street light.

He was all day on the mountain and he was very tired. He came in front of the door and sighed when he thought he should have a shower tonight, too. He didn't have clean underwear, either. He needed to do the laundry. That was lot of chores, he thought with a look of a martyr. He unlocked the door and entered the house.

He knew he should enter the bathroom and start his routine, but he didn't feel like it. Suddenly he felt thirsty.

"Is there another beer in the fridge?"

He opened it. On the door there were two beers. He extended his hand to take one, but how surprised he was when the beer started jumping around and running down the hall! Hand ran after him and tried to catch it, but the beer was quicker. He came slowly near it and pushed it into a corner, but the beer flew upwards and over his head.

Astounded, but also surprised from the weird behavior of the beer, Hans went to the living room and tried to plunge into the sofa. With an extraordinary funny movement, the sofa withdrew from its place and Hans landed on the floor.

What was this today? Hans sat on the floor thinking what to do. He didn't even try to get up. He was thinking all the time he needed to go and have a shower, but he couldn't move. He stood in that position a minute or two.

Suddenly, the broom came from behind the door and started a funny dance around him pushing him from time to time.

"What is this? What are you doing? Stop!" he said to the broom, but he couldn't help but start laughing. He started wrestling and pushing the broom, trying to defend. The broom pushed him and pushed him, until finally he entered the bathroom involuntarily.

The whole fatigue disappeared like it hadn't been there. He was feeling good and couldn't stop laughing. He remembered his chore. When he was already there, in the bathroom, he turned on the light and looked at the mirror. He was so untidy. With one hand he passed over his chin and saw his beard is quite thick. Should he shave? Oh, how much he hated that! But, when he felt that laziness started overtaking him, the shaving machine turned on and started pretending to attack him.

"What is this? Shoo! Go away!" ha laughed and with his hand tried to defend from the harasser.

But it wouldn't stop.

Hans was thinking. The dance of the things in his house was fun and amused him. But, he thought, the broom and the shaving machine wanted something from him and that was why they were after him. What? He had to change his routine and grow. There, he would try to shave with that machine that flew around him like a bird and tried to peck him. What would happen if he did?

"Won't you stop so I can shave?"

The machine obediently stopped and landed on the glass in front of the mirror. But not it wasn't just the ordinary, boring machine that was only a chore shaving with, but something new and interesting. Hans took it and shaved smoothly. He felt very nice and continued in the bathroom to shower, comb and groom, like never before in his life.

Then he turned around and saw the pile of dirty clothes. He remembered he didn't have anything to wear and he must do the laundry. He opened the door of the washing machine and started filling it, but as he was shoving the laundry inside, they flew out and jumped aside.

"What is going on now? Oh, I understood, this piece is colored and should wash separately. This is white, can go in. But why did the button turned itself for a half a circle? Let me see! Oh, it's on another program, at a lower temperature! So, this is how laundry is done!"

He turned the machine on and went to cook his dinner. After he ate it, he sat on a computer and started surfing. The keys on the keyboard started pushing themselves and it opened a great blog for men written in a German language. Hans checked it's content and saw there was everything a modern man should be interested in, advice on how to dress, how to keep hygiene and everything, that a man makes attractive for the opposite sex.

The next day Hans had a basket full of perfectly washed laundry. Nothing in his house was as it used to be. Household appliances turned themselves on the desired temperature and waited for him to learn, the knife held him a long lesson about how to chop vegetables, the pot pulled itself from the tap so excess water wouldn't enter, and the blanket and the pillow lifted over his bed and stayed there until he changed in his pajama. With the dancing things in his house, the everyday chores ceased to be a hardship for Hans. On the contrary, he had fun because they reminded him of a chore always in a new, interesting way, that incited him and motivated him to do it and feel pleasure from doing it.

That way, three months passed.