Escape

chpt. 6 Awkwardness

*SIDE NOTE: That night was the end for me and the dl dude I was in love with. After that night we only communicated about the project and presented. That was it. I was waiting for him to man-up and tell me and everybody he wanted to be with me. Obviously he was afraid. I understood why he didn't want to, because coming out isn't easy for anyone. We don't talk to this day but hopefully in the future when he's ready, he'll hit me up. He has my number❤️*

From this point forward everything is make-believe and made up now.

It's 7:30 in the morning and it's time to get ready for school again. Today Xavier and I had to present our project in front of the class today. Today is such a depressing day for me. Dealing with this nigga, on top of having to present a project with him is not really what I want to do right now. At the end of the day it's my grade fucking up if I don't do it. I get up and got dressed. Went down to eat breakfast with fam and headed to school so I can get this day over with.

I walk into the building to go to my first class and there is that hater named Aniya. My thoughts when I seen this btc was to walk up to her and whoop her a** but since I got common sense, I discreetly said under my breath "God gone handle you baby" When I walked past her I then seen Xavier, he saw me and I looked away because I didn't want him seeing or looking at me... I then went to my seat just anxiously waiting for the teacher to call my group name so we can get this presentation over with.

FINALLY after 5 groups presented already it was my groups turn and we was the last one. I walked up to the front of class with my group and we presented our project. In the midst of us presenting this n*gga X kept making eye contact with me the whole time. I was frustrated and mad at first but in the back of mind I was kinda happy because I really liked or do like him and I didn't want to ruin what we had but I just had to let go. I just knew if I went back into our situation again, it was gone be the same bullsh*t when I first started dealing with him.

After 5 minutes we was done presenting our project, we all then went back to our seat and waited for the bell ring. *BELL RINGS* The teacher then yells "UNT UNT THE BELL DOES NOT DISMISS YOU, I DO", I then yelled "GIRL BYE" the whole class laughed and while everyone is laughing Xavier was laughing too and looked back at me, we both made eye contact for like 30 seconds and then I started packing my stuff and left.

FAST FOWARD FIVE HOURS....

(I'm now in my bed doing my homework) All of sudden my phone made a swoop sound and I checked to see who it was and y'all guess who it was? yeah it was him. The text said "yhu funny asl 4 wat yhu said in class, yhu lucky she ain't write yhu up. yhu kno how ms.greene is lol" I started writing out my text to respond back to him but I then erased the text message when I remembered everything we been through. I sat my phone back down on my bed and continue to do some more homework.

After finishing homework mom calls for dinner again, I go downstairs to get sum to eat. Tonight we had collar greens, baked mac, steak and cornbread.

30 Minutes go by

I'm done with my plate, I sat it in the sink and went upstairs to chill around for a lil bit and then get ready for bed. As soon as I walked up the stairs I could hear my phone ringing like hell so I walked a lil faster to see who it was. I was hoping it was Xavier but it wasn't it was a unknown number. I answered it and "HEY XAVIER GOT SHOT, CAN YOU COME TO THE HOSPITAL?" at first I was mad asl as to why the f*ck they screaming on my f*cking phone but then it took me a minute to process what was said and then I gagged. "Noooo, who's this?" I said calmly to whoever I was talking to. "I'M XAVIER GIRL BESTFRIEND, YOU GOTTA COME TO THE HOSPITAL, HE SAID HE WANTED TO SEE YOU, HE DOING OKAY NOW" she says as she's weeping. "Okay I'll think about it" I said and hung up. After I got off the phone I went to my bed to process what just happened. My heart was pounding damn near 10000 bpm, my hands were shaking, I was having an anxiety attack. After 5 minutes I was able to catch myself and calm myself down before I broke down crying and go on a rage. I was kind of hesitant to go because I didn't know if I wanted to put myself in the same place me and Xavier was once at. At the same time I was thinking about how I really cared or do care about this man and wouldn't want anything bad to happen to him. So I decided to go to the hospital. I texted the unknown number asking for a address and I was on my way with my mother driving me there.

15 minutes later

I arrived at the hospital, went up to front desk asking for Xavier Hines. Nurse directed me to his room. On my way to his room his best friend was there outside the door along with a police officer. I walked up to them and saw X laying in the bed. At this point I started breaking down crying because I don't like to see nobody I care about in pain. I went into the room and walked up to X and he seen me. We made eye contact. No words was said for a few minutes and then the silence was broken. "I'm sorry" he said for the first time in a long time."I'm sorry" He proceeds to grab my right hand and hold it. It was really awkward because I didn't know what to do or say. I just broke down crying and got on the bed with him. His best friend walks in, I immediately got up thinking I didn't want his best friend to know about us "I already know" she said, he tells me everything. I was surprised and looked at X and looked back at her. I was mad inside because he specifically told me not to say anything but here he is running his mouth. "He got shot in his hip, the doctor pulled out the bullet wound and they said he was gonna be find. He just needs to take it easy" "Man I'm gone be alright" Xavier said trying to joke about the situation and make light of it. "That's good, just wanted to make sure you were okay, I guess I'll see you tomorrow " I say as I walk backwards towards the door "Hold on!" I look back. "Stay with me" I was hesitant, but I just nodded my head and walked back to Xavier. I got back on the bed, he then swaddled me into his arms, his best friend sat in the chair. She starts asking us questions.