Taste in men! Semishira

Chapter 29

[Edit: it's been a month since my last edit. Sorry (; ]

Semi's POV:

"Sir, are you going to pay?" The cashier asked. Realising i have been staring down at my closed fist -the fist that had the piece of paper in- i physically shook my head for zoning out.

"Yeah, sorry." I fake laughed, earning a weird side glance from shirabu. I don't blame him. I'm acting like an awkward looser.
I payed for my food and followed Shirabu to a table. I call myself lucky to not suffer with any type of anxiety disorder or whatever. I'm a pretty rational thinker... most times. But, the times like this. When something so large is taking your entire mind and none of your surrounding really exist to you. I take a quick, tiny glance to the paper in my hand under the table. The paper that read;

~
Call me;)
*No.#* ~ Sora
~

Stupid. Stupid stupid. I am so fucking stupid. It's nothing. It's nothing it's nothing it's....
It could be something.
He said he was nice. The boy who calls nobody nice, the boy who hates literally everything.
It could be something.
What other reason would there be for not telling me immediately.

I knew something was wrong before.
I'm not overthinking. This has confirmed my original worries.

But dear fucking God i hope i'm just fucking stupid.

"You okay?" Shirabu asked, probably concerned from... this. Me. What the fuck is going on.

"Yeah.. Headache. Killer." I easily lie, massaging my temples to convince my act. "I'll pick up some medication on the way home."

"Oh.. yeah, we'll leave after we've eaten."

"Cool, thanks." I wink, he fights of a smile as i try fight to put a smile on.
We made small conversations but i mostly used to food as an excuse for my lack of socialising. I couldn't tell if Shirabu could tell my change of personality. Usually i would say yes. Shirabu knows me far too well to not realise such a change. But, i'm starting to consider that i might be over romanticising Semi and Shirabu. I think i always have.

We arrive home and i haven't had a moment, a single second, where i wasn't over thinking about that stupid note. I think i've gone through six-hundred plus scenarios in my head.
"I'm gonna head to bed, shit hurts." I point at my head then lazily waved at my boyfriend goodnight.

"Okay.. uh, i'll be up in a bit.. Goodnight."

Closing my bedroom door and collapsing onto my bed felt like a massive weight being taken off... then being dropped right back on me. I felt like my entire body was being crushed.
I hate thinking.
This is so frustrating.

Just to make myself feel a little more shit, I take that small, stupid fucking piece of paper back out my pocket as if it would have somehow changed.

But no. Of course it hadn't;

Call me;)
*No.#* ~ Sora

I'm not accusing Shirabu of cheating. But... why didn't he tell me.

[Text]

Me:
Yo

T_Okaro:
Yo

Me:
Yo

T_Okaro:
:/
what's up

Me:
Mid life crisis

T_Okaro:
you're not gonna pass the age of 40?

Me:
You know i love to joke
but this is for real this time

T_Okaro:
okay okay
what's up then

Me:
wanna meet up ? tmw ?

T_Okaro:
Uh sure, sounds good

Me:
Thanks, i just need some advice

T_okaro:
Is everything okay?

Me:
Funny

T_okaro:
....
i'll see you tmw Semi

Me:
(:

T_okaro:
take care please

Me:
I will don't worry
See you tomorrow Tomo

seen

~
For next few hours i continued doing the thing i've been doing all afternoon. Think.
I wasn't tired. And even if i was i wouldn't be able to get sleep from the thinking.

Shirabu didn't even once come in -despite saying he would. He didn't sleep in here that night either.

It was around three AM when i was tired enough to get some sleep,

finally.

~~
[A/n: why i'm doing this you ask? I dunno, i really really don't know. Please kill me.]

Edit; the next chapter is when i'm changing the entire story line.

short ass chapter