The voice in my head tells me i'm enough, and i'm aware of that. It's just sometimes I could be a bother, I tend to overthink, over-love, over-ask, but as I was sitting in my room listening to my music. The voice asked me why, why what you may ask. The voice in my head asked me why I was thinking of him. I just couldn't help myself, I sat back and relaxed then that's when I realized. I was never asking for too much I was just asking the wrong person. I chose to see the good in him, I chose to ignore the red flags but they say love is blind. Is that what it was? Love? the voice in my head tells me no and I cant help but agree, how could I be in love with him?? impossible. I couldn't sleep that night, just up with no reason at all just up wondering why in the world I couldn't sleep and what this empty feeling inside of me? Actually I have a question, people say "follow your heart" but if your heart is broken into a million pieces, which piece do you follow? that's an amazing thing to think about but it bothers me that I can't find the answer. It was a battle between me and him, a battle between hurt and self love. I love myself I really do, my heart tells me break down my walls and be with him but my mind tells me a different story. The story of heartbreak, the story from a broken hearted girl. The voice in my head tells me to stop trying, I say that I love him but I know that i'm lying. I'm in love with who I want him to be, and not who he is, to be honest I don't think I could love him with his flaws. Cause the picture of him i've imprinted in my head was flawless, and there I was, staring at a picture of him and looking in the mirror. Tear after tear, let him go the voice tells me bring him closer my heart whispers. I looked at the picture and back at the mirror where my now unhappy reflection stares right back at me. I burn this picture of him and erase my flawless image, I couldn't help but wonder if in time the memories would fade, how come memories stay and people don't? a question with a sad truth behind it. That I have yet to share, I look in the mirror and wipe my last tear, the voice in my head tells me that this is the last year. The last year where I stop my life because of him, the last year where I shed anything less than an happy tear because of him. This was MY year. I break that broken reflection then laugh at who I was and bow to whom i'll become, because finally.......She chose herself.
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An Open Heart
Random"An Open Heart" is the story more personal to me. The story where I'll take my readers on my life's road. Let you guys into my mind and let you visualize my inner thoughts and feelings.
