Shadow Searcher (completed)

hope

*****Jasmine's pov*****

Pain. Its the first feeling I take notice of as my consciousness awakens. Immense pain, in my shoulder, in my arm, in my leg, in my back. Pain. Each thump of my heart even brings pain. Thump, pain. Thump, pain. Thump, pain. Damn silver. Jeez, maybe I would have gone with them voluntarily had I known they where gonna shoot me eight times with silver bullets. Actually, I know I wouldn't have, but still... they could have offered.

Now that I'm finally conscious, I can feel my wounds start the healing process. Good, that way as soon as I see my father's face I can beat him up with silver. Then he can see how he likes it. The bastard.

Practically fully awake now, I feel the coldness surrounding my wrists and ankles. What the seamonkeys? I painfully blink my eyes open to find myself in a cold, dark, dirty basement. Still a bit dizzy, I start to shuffle forward only to be stopped and flung back into the wall by chains. As soon as my already abused head connects with the wall, I let out a whimper of pain.That so did not help with my whole pain situation. Stupid chains. Wait, chains?! Oh come on, as if being kidnapped by your cold blooded killer of a father isn't enough, they just had to throw chains into this mess. Fabulous. (note the highly used sarcasm)

Hmm, maybe I can shift into my wolf now that my battle wounds are mostly healed. Then I could escape and kick my father's sorry ass,sounds like a good plan to me.Clearing my head of everything else I prepare to shift. And... nothing. What the fudge?!

It feels as if a thick fog moved into my mind, blocking my ability to shift and honestly making me quite dizzy.

Feeling absolutely exhausted, I slump down and just hang there with the chains cutting off my wrist's circulation of much needed blood.

Why in the bloody hell can't I shift? Wait a minute! Quickly I turn my head to peer at the cuffs in closer inspection. Yep, just as I thought, silver. The ones around my ankles must be silver to, because to stop a werewolf from shifting you must have silver touching all four limbs. Stupid, but highly effective.

Sighing, I hung my head. But not in defeat, just exhaustion. It would be a cold day in hell when I admit defeat, for I am not the type of person to give up easily. Ever. Actually, I'm quite stubborn.

And just when I thought it couldn't get any worse, the door in the far corner of this dreaded room swung open, casting a blinding light into the small confinement. Blinking the black dots out of my vision, I managed to see it was my father who tried blinding me with the unholy bright light.

Out of instinct, I let a growl rip free of my throat and travel across the tense atmosphere. Father freezes in mid step and sneers, "I wouldn't growl at me bitch. I call the shots now." Heading his advise, I keep my mouth shut, no need to encourage his pointless banter.

Seeing I'm ignoring him, father glides towards me in a hostile fashion and before I even had the chance to speak, flings his hand across my cheek. My head hits the wall beside me, making the sting of his grubby hand worse. Before I could recover, he punches me straight in the gut. Twice. Three times. Four. I see he hasn't lost his abusiveness, shame. The sounds of the blows echo off the walls, an effect making the beating even worse as I double over in pain.

Breathing heavily, he finally stops his anticipated blows and steps away. Feeling suicidal, I smile and spit the upcoming blood out and mutter,"I've missed you daddykins, no one has had that special touch that you have when throwing a punch. Your filthy hands really add the icing onto the cake." Sensing my sarcasm, he punches me in the jaw, making a ringing sound enter my ears. "I'm in charge here, don't forget that. So if I say bow, you better be on the fucking floor in two seconds flat. Got it?" Father asks, glaring at me. But I still refuse, I will not comply to the man who killed my mother, my brother, and my childhood. So with an aching body, I just stared blankly at him.

Unsatisfied, he lifts his foot and kicks me hard in the leg, causing me to loose my footing and hang suspended by the dreadful chains. Regardless, I keep my blank mask on as I regain my feet and shakily stand. Showing my pain will just encourage him. And that's the last thing I want to do right now. And yet, dad still just grabs my golden locks and slams my head against the concrete wall. Resulting in my body starting to convulse and shake as I feel the first signs of myself loosing consciousness.

Another punch throws me into the stone wall again. I can't even fight back, the metal of the cuffs bitterly bite into my skin whenever I try.

A kick, a punch. Another slap, Another kick. It all adds up to one thing: pain. Pain, pain, pain. Its one thing that I've come to expect in life. Its like a broken record, no matter what happens, it always comes back to it. Sadly, its practically the only thing I can count on when I nothing else is reliable. Pain. Only pain. Its terrible, I know, but true.

Finally, my body shuts down and I'm able to succumb to the inviting darkness of nothing. Nothing is better than the ever oncoming pain. Compared to this physical and mental agony, the nothingness is pure bliss. I welcome it with open arms. Sad, but true. Even nothing is a treat.

***************** "Mommy, I made you a picture today!!" I say, happily skipping to where mother stood with my newborn brother in her arms. A cheerful smile lit up my face as dad came out from the car and ruffled my hair. "Its very pretty Jazzy," mom said while observing it. She carefully tucks it in her apron pocket and loops arms with daddy. My brother suddenly let's out a gurgly laugh and points up into the clear blue sky. Following his pudgy finger we all smile as we spot the colorful kite flying through the air, blocking the glare of the sun for a short while. Even at 4 years old I could appreciate the beauty of the day and the joyous feeling it brought all of us.

At that small moment together it felt like we were invincible, like nothing could tear us apart. We were a family.

**************

The memory gave me the one thing that I need to survive in this place, even though it was something I had lost so long ago that I thought I would never get it back. It gave me hope.

And now that I had it back, I was never letting it go again.