What an Honor it is

"Shut up! Just....shut up!" The long pause was enough to drive you up the wall. His expression pleaded with you more than his words could. He couldn't bear to say them. "Pack your shit. Get out." you mumble through your gritted teeth, your fists clenched.

"Forgive me..."

"In your dreams." You spit back, grabbing his coat and pushing it onto him along with an empty bag. "Get out. I'm serious." The tears on your face were feeling cold on your cheeks. He doesn't move so you rip the bag from his hands and run to your shared bedroom. You start grabbing his robes, his shirts, his trousers and shoving as much as you could into the bag. You run back to the door and throw out the bag into the snow. He stares at you, not moving.

"Please-"

"No! Get out!" You scream. You were more unsure than you let on. Maybe he knew. He goes outside but while he's outside you slam and lock the door. You rest your back against the wood and start to sob profusely, covering your face with your hands. You hear his powerful knock at the door but the anger swells up in your chest again. "Leave! I won't say it again!" You felt more unsure now than ever. You knew he didn't leave, you knew he was still on the doorstep but you stand up again, pressing your forehead against the door. You didn't have the heart to leave him out there. Before you could touch the doorknob again you can hear him shuffling.

"Can we please just talk about this?" His voice was no more than a mumble, but your resolve was weakening.

"Fine." You open the door, your face still red and teary and shake your head. "You know what? I don't want to talk. I'm tired of being compared to her. Little by little, you tear me down by those comparisons. That was just. The last straw. I could never be her? Never be as good as her? Sev, that hurt. I mean I know I'm not her. I wont be her. I thought you like...knew that. Damn it, I try every day to be BETTER or more LIKE her but I just..." he could tell you were in a frenzy so he grabs both of your hands in his and brings them to his chest.

"Look at me." You close your eyes before looking up at his stern gaze. "She isn't you, but I chose you, I need you."

"I don't believe you, Sev."

"Please, Y/N, just listen to me!" He takes your face in his hands. "I am so in love with you. It's you. Just you." He sounded breathless, as if you had exhausted him. You realize this is the first time he's admitted this to you. You take a moment to process his words, letting him hold your hands firmly against his chest.

"I just want to feel good enough for you."

"You're more than that." He says smoothly, you move forward and let his arms envelop you. He was so warm, his chest was thrumming loudly and you rest your hands on his back. His robes made you feel like you were in a blanket, they closed around you and protected you from the evils outside. You lightly sob, so he moves to pick you up, your legs around his middle, and carries you to bed. You just sit with him on the bed as his hands stroke your hair softly and slowly until your breath is steady. He almost thinks you're asleep until you move to face him and speak again.

"You're....in love with me?" His breath stops, you can tell he was surprised that you couldn't believe it.

"I um..." he clears his throat. "I wouldn't have come here, to have this weekend alone, if I wasn't." You pull yourself even closer against him, your face buried in his neck and leaving gentle kisses there.

"I think..." You pull away to see his red, placid face, rendered useless against the loving gaze of his eyes. "I'm....in love with you, too." You lean forward slightly, only for him to pull you closer to kiss you, your hands immediately finding his hair. You feel like your bodies are connecting, your souls reaching for each other. You had to get closer, and frantically search for any type of button to free any area of skin you could find. It just happened to be at the base of his neck, down his chest. Once you get down about five buttons he stops you and looks at you almost sternly. You turn your head to the side. "What's up?"

"I've...never..." he coughs. You smile, giggling a little.

"Its okay. Follow my lead and do what you think feels good and I'll stop you if it doesn't." he looks scared to death and you find it too endearing not to kiss him again. His hands grab roughly at your ass and you smile against his lips, running your fingers over the newly exposed skin. You hear him sigh deeply and run his hands from your ass to the tops of your thighs, under the dress you were wearing from dinner.

Dinner was amazing, he's the best cook and you had worn a stunning red dress even though it was just you in a tiny cabin deep in the forest. It was home-y and extremely warm.

He couldn't stop himself from touching the skin of your back, causing the dress to rise to your stomach. You couldn't get his shirt undone quickly enough. He stops kissing you to get his robes off his shoulders and his shirt undone enough to get it off and let you touch him. He gets your dress off just as easily and presses against you roughly. Apparently he was just as skin to skin as you were. He fumbles with the clasp of your bra but you don't expect him to figure it out. Almost instantly it pops and is on the floor just as quickly. The franticness of your undressing leaves both of you breathless. You suddenly felt exposed but he's staring at you with such strong intensity it makes you weak. You both take a moment to breathe slowly and take in the sight of each other.

"Fuck...you are so beautiful..." You turn away but he holds your jaw in place, kissing you fiercely again. He snaps the waistband of your underwear, making you laugh. "Stand up." his deep voice makes you weak to whatever he asks and you wait for more instructions. He pulls you by your waist and kisses your stomach, holding you to him. You shiver, tangling your fingers in his hair again and gasping when he bites you gently and hums as he hears it. He grabs the band of your underwear and pulls it down your thighs, making you even more self conscious as you were before. He looks up at you, adoringly and whispers quietly. "I love you. You are so beautiful. I can't believe you're mine." you sigh and he pulls them off all the way. He puts his hand between your legs and pushes them apart, finding your clit almost instantly.

"Ah! I can't...." you moan quietly

"Let me hear you." He says in a husky tone, circling your clit quickly just to get a reaction. You can't help but moan loudly and your knees tremble. You push his hand away in an act of defiance to get on your knees and unbuckle his belt, running your fingers against the fabric of his pants. Your fingers trace the seam of his pants as you work up to his waist. His breath hitches which gets you even more aroused and once you free him from the belt and pants you hum and quickly put his cock in your mouth, swirling your tongue around the head. "How are you so good at this?" He moves his hips involuntarily and you let him, his fingers in your hair. He stops you after a bit, pulling your face up so he could kiss you again. He pulls you into his lap again and flips you onto your back. He gets on his knees like you were before and immediately finds your clit again and circles it with his tongue. You jerk forward and moan loudly grabbing his hair roughly and feeling the pool of pleasure in your stomach. He keeps getting faster and faster until you have to stop him.

"I'm going to cum if you don't stop." He nods, crawling back up to kiss you and you kiss him hard. "Please, Sev. I want you so badly." He couldn't resist you, teasing your entrance and finally slowly pushes inside you. You couldn't help but move your hips against him to pull him deeper and encourage him to move faster. He moans out loud and moves his hips slowly as if he was afraid of breaking you. You pull your legs against his back to keep him from stopping. He gets faster and more confident as you continue. Your moans flowing together almost at the same time. He moves his hands to find your clit as he thrusts into you, making you shake even more. You can feel the muscles in your legs about to give out.

"I'm so close, Y/N..." he sighs.

"Me too....please." You finish one after the other, your faces coated with bliss and ecstasy. He falls on top of you and pecks you on the lips and then on your sweaty forehead. "I love you so much, Sev. You have no idea."

"What an honor it is to be loved by you." He whispers. "Also, please don't hate me...."

"Oh god..."

"I'm more experienced than I let on."

"I knew it." you laugh "Jerk."