Luke's POV
I wake up and notice Calum is still sleeping. He looks so cute when he's asleep. I walk into the kitchen and decide to make Calum breakfast. I turn the stove on and grab a pan from the cupboard. I make eggs, bacon, toast, sausage and get out orange juice. I get plates out and put two prices if toast on each plate, four sausage links on each plate, six pieces of bacon and some scrambled eggs on each. I walk into the living room to wake Calum up, he just looks so cute. I get out my phone and take a picture. I lightly shake Calum and whisper for him to get up. His eyes flutter open and he looks at me. He smiles and tells me good morning.
'Cal. Its 1:30' I tell him and laugh.
'Oops. Hey, what smells good? Did you make breakfast?' He asks and his smile gets bigger.
'Uh.. yeah I did. I hope you don't mind I went thr-' I get cut off by Calum getting up and hugging me.
'No, Lukey. Its fine. Thank you' I blush so hard.
'Lukey?' I ask and he immediately let's me go and his face is so red.
'S-sorry. It just slipped -' I cut him off by kissing him. I had to, he just looks so kissable.
'S-so how bout breakfast?' I quickly ask and change the subject.
'Y-yeah'. he replies and walks away. I follow him and hand him his plate.
'Wow, Luke. This looks amazing!!' He says with the biggest smile ever.
'T-thanks Cal' We sit down and start eating. We didn't really talk much until we were almost done eating. Calum looks at me and asks the worst question possible.
'Luke, are you gay?' I immediately grew uncomfortable.
'what? no! never. I will never be gay or be friends with someone who is gay'. I shout and Calum has tears in is eyes.
'W-what was the hand holding, the cuddling, the kiss!?' He yells and starts crying. His cheeks are filled with his tears and I feel horrible.
'No, Cal. Please, no. You're gay, aren't you?' I question and he starts to cry more.
'Luke. I've liked you for seven years!!! How much more obvious do I have to get!?' He screams and falls to the floor crying.
'You kissed me Luke!! You held my hand, you broke my heart'. he says the last part in a whisper.
'I am I'm fact straight' I say and start I get my things.
'I am in fact broken' he says, to himself.
'Goodbye, Luke' he whispers and looks up at me. I can't help the tears forming in my eyes as I get my shoes on. He's huddled in the corner with bloodshot eyes and tear stained cheeks. This is all my fault. But I'm not gay, I remind myself. I walk out of Calums house without another word. He just sat there and cried. As soon as I walked out I bursted into tears and that's when I realized, I can't be straight. Calum makes me feel some type of way I can't explain. He makes me smile, blush and laugh like crazy. But I can't just go back in there and say 'hey I just realized I'm not gay, sorry about breaking your heart' That's awful. I'm awful.
Calum's POV
After Luke left I just sat in the corner of the kitchen until it got dark out. I decided to get up because I really had to go to the bathroom. I walk into the bathroom and do my businesses and as I'm washing my hands a glare catches my eyes. I dry my hands and pick it up. The shiny blade bringing back memories from the couple cuts on my arm. I press the cold metal to my skin and see the red liquid come out of the sliced skin. I feel.. happy. I cut my wrist again and again until I couldn't see the skin on my wrist anymore. Seeing the blood makes me feel alive. I start to cry realizing how messed up I am. I used to be happy, never had the thought of cutting until Luke and Michaela became a thing.
After about ten minuets of watching the blood drip off my wrist I clean everything up and wrap my wrist. I sit in my room and just think. I think about what I did wrong, why I don't deserve Luke, why my mom left for a couple if days, why I'm depressed. I finally know why. Luke.
-Monday-
Calum's POV
I haven't slept since Luke left. I haven't eaten. I only got up to go to the bathroom and maybe get something to drink. I cut more too, I know its not good but its the only thing that makes me feel any emotion anymore.
I'm not going to school. I'm not seeing Luke, I can't see Luke. He would just make fun of me for being gay, he would tell the whole school and I would be messed with all the time. I can't risk that. So.. I just sit.
-Saturday-
Calum's POV
I haven't gone to school all week. I called in sick, they believed me because I'm always at school. Haven't missed a day in years. I started playing my guitar so I wasn't bored all day. I play guitar and sing all day, I wrote a couple of songs.
'Beside You'
'He Looks So Perfect'
and I'm still writing
'Amnesia'
Yes, they are all about Luke. He really messed me up. You know who else messed me up? My mom. She came home Thursday, packed her bags, left me with a shit ton of money and left. She said shed be back in about a month to bring me more money. I guess she's been sleeping with this guy named Stephano. He sounds and looks gay if you ask me. My mom said he has good money so we will be okay. Whatever.
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Hi. Sorry about this chapter. Its longer then the rest so I guess that's good. I'm updating now because I have school tomorrow so I wouldn't be able to update. I'll try and update in the next couple days.
