Ecstasy (boyxboy)

Chapter 1

Ghost's POV

David and I are finally done moving into our dorm room? Apartment. Condo?

Yea, that should be it. Condo.

"This place is much bigger than I imagined." David remarks setting up the bed which I fall into, bone exhausted. "Hey! This room is mine, Fat ass. Move."

I flip him the bird and stuff my face into the pillow, slightly falling asleep. I vaguely hear shuffling around the room before David slips into the bed with me, his snores eventually taking me to sleep land with him.

My eyes flutter open, barely able to see anything from the blur of my sleep. It clears eventually and my eyes wander through the empty room.

I look besides me and David isn't there, his outline on the bed being the only determinant that he was here merely minutes ago.

I drag myself through the room and to the kitchen, where I find him fixing us dinner. That's David, so domestic.

I pull a stool out and settle myself at the island. Watching him, I sigh.

"You're being stiff, sad even," I say. "You said it won't change anything between us."

I feel his gaze on me and from experience I know he's trying to pull himself together.

"Say something please."

He sighs. "I'm not going to say I'm not hurt, Ghostly." My breath hitches in my throat. He knows how much I hate it when he calls me that." I'm not going to act like I don't feel the way I do."

"I'm not asking you to." I stare at him. "I really wish I could feel the same. But I don't...." My voice hitches as I think about how to say this without it breaking him.  "I'm not built like that." I complete.

"Okay." His voice a whisper. Broken.

As broken as the silence between us when I'd turned him down after he told me how he'd been in love with me for the past four years, hoping I'd feel the same. I'd never been as shocked as I was that night, because I've always been able to tell when someone wanted me.

I'd passed it off as a joke, convinced it was one, but the silence had given me the answers.

"Its okay." He'd said.

But it wasn't okay. Its not. I don't want my best friend in love with me. I'll never be able to look at him the same way, let alone feel the same. I was after all... Straight. And even if I wasn't, I'm not built for relationships.

I loved yes, but not for long. At least not when I set my eyes on someone better.

I release a heavy sigh and look at him.

I honestly just wish I could see his face right now.

Why did He have to fall for me though? There are some many wonderful males who could do better, be better out there.

Why me ?

"I just wish we could go back to how we was, you know. I hate the tension. Its so fucking thick it makes it hard to breathe." I say and He looks away. "I don't want to pretend that you're not hurting and it makes me feel worse knowing I'm the cause of it."

"Its not your fault that you're perfect." He states and I can hear the smirk in his voice.

"I wish you would stop saying that." I groan

He laughs then. "I could stop saying it but i won't stop thinking it. You don't have to worry about me G, we're in a new environment, new house, new beginning. I'm just getting my first heartbreak. I'll get over it and I'll get over you too."