Ecstasy (boyxboy)

Chapter 3

Hey lovers. This chapter contains really dark themes and mentions of suicide. If you find stuff like that triggering, this chapter is not for you. If not, enjoy😘

Ghost's POV

"How'd it go?" Marcia questions.

"Community service. 400 hours." I groan.

Its only our fourth day here and now I'm going to have to be responsible.

She arches a brow before settling down on the couch." Well, isn't that a little too light for your stupid self."

I narrow a glare at her." Shut up, Marcy."

"Just be grateful you're not going to juvie. In as much as you deserve it for being so manipulative and reckless, Aubrey still needs you. Maybe you can mature a bit during this time frame."

I know she's right, but I feel a certain ball of rage grow within me and I'm so close to the brink of losing control. Rather than answer her, I walk away, heading for my room to take my meds.

I haven't been taking it, always doubting its consistency, but after being without it for so long, the feeling of unshed tears burn my eyes and the desire to hurt my self and someone becomes overwhelming.

I throw the pills into my mouth, chewing harshly as I feel the ball in my chest grow bigger. I look into the mirror before closing my eyes as the tears spill over.

I'm worthless after all. Why should they expect much more from me? I wonder why their opinions mattered to me. They're fake after all.

'Yours is the only one that should matter, Ghostly. And even that's not worth much. You're trash. That's why your mother never looked for you. Because you're selfish. If you weren't you would have ended it. You should have killed yourself.' My subconscious sneers at me.

"SHUT UP!!!" I yell, punching the mirror and I gasp as I look down at my hand, wincing at the shards of glass in my fingers,blood slipping through from in between.

I turn around to find Marcia behind me, her face as pale as a ghost.

"Ghost I..." I walk out of the room as she starts, grabbing my bandana and wrapping it around my finger.

I walk out the dorm, taking full breaths before looking around. I stand around for a bit, tapping my feet on the cold ground, wondering why the meds haven't begun to take full effects.

I start walking to no where in particular, feeling my sudden depression begin to take course again. I'm probably going to walk to the Faculty's top and throw myself off the building.

I'm walking aimlessly when I notice the thugs following me. Its pretty subtle but I can tell I'm their target. I've been in this life way too long.

The feeling the rage takes control of me, so I lead them to a particular dead end. Its so ironic how they probably think they're the predators and I'm the prey. Well they're in for a surprise.

I stop at the edge of the brick wall around an abandoned factory. Turning to face them, I see four men, the colour blue evident. Crips.

At least now I know what I'm going to be throwing. Not myself off some building, but punches. Very strong ones.

____________

"What the fuck Ghost?" David rushes over as I enter our condo and puts his hands on my face, trying to examine my bruises. I slap His hands away.

He frowns. "You got into a fight again?" He shakes his head. "I thought we were leaving that life behind us, Ghost?" The disappointment is pretty evident in his voice. Not like I'm not used to it.

"It was self defense. Some Crips tried to beat me up." I look around. "Where're the others?"

"You're getting into gang activity now...."

"Oh will you shut up already OK." I look at him and I feel the hurt in his eyes. I look away, swallowing the guilt. "You're giving me a fucking headache."

"The girls went out to look for you. Aubrey's watching the TV. You should clean up before you see her." He walks away then.

I groan. Why am I such a fuck up?!!!

I head to my room and take off my clothes, wincing with every small pain each body movement caused me. They got me good. I'll give em that.

I take a cold shower, before taking out the first aid kit and picking the shards of glass out of my hands. Wrapping my hand in a bandage, I look at my face and see the purpling bruises. Nothing to hide those. At least its not swelling.

I place the kit back and I walk into the Malena's bedroom to find Aubrey watching the Teletubbies. I've never understood children's fascination with Dr Seuss inspired Barney's and a smiling sun child thingy. I remember watching it for hours on end with my twin brother, Phan....

I block the memory out as I close her eyes with both my hands, her immediately grabbing them while giggling like the baby she is. I grab her and hop on the bed with her.

"Whatcha doing?" I ask, looking at the TV screen.

"Looking at green baby." She points.

"Want some ice cream?" I peck her on the cheek.

"Yes, Daddy. Look! Green baby and blue baby going to their house." Her eyes are so wide with fascination that I burst out laughing.

"Yes they are. Sun baby's smiling as well."

"Sun baby's smiling as well? Look, your hand is white." She looks down at my bandaged hand.

"Yes, Daddy hurt his hand, but daddy's all good. You want to write your A B C's on it."

"Yes! Yes! Yes!" She hops on the bed, Teletubbies and ice cream forgotten.

Going to get her crayons. She gets to work. Writing A to D and 1 and 3, the only ones she knows how to, she leaves no part uncovered. She soon yawns loudly and I take her to her bed in my room and put her to sleep.

Sitting down on my bed, I stare at my sleeping baby and I wonder what I ever did for a messed up fuck like me to deserve her.

The answer is Nothing and I make a promise to myself to earn her love from now on.

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Author's note

Wasn't expecting that were you? Two plot twist in one chapter ayy?

Trust me, we're only beginning this story. If this shocking, by the end, you'll probably be reeling from it.

What were your thoughts on this chapter and the reveals that came from it.

And I know most of you are probably wondering when the boyxboy action will take place. Baby steps my friend.

Don't forget to follow, vote and comment.

I'll be updating regularly.

Love,
XOXO❤