A MiLiOn reasons

The Maze

I found love in you and now no other love will do
We had it once we had it made... Now we've lost our way 

But hope sits at bay, No matter how long it takes; there's no other way

I believe in you and what we can be 

find me in the maze hold me in your gaze

 I believe in you and I believe in me

You're the only one I need, why can't you see

your the only one I see I'm the only one you need

Caught in the middle 

life is a maze and our love is a Riddle

    If you could just find me in the maze 

hold me in your gaze and the darkness of life will fade.  

V&Jace

After each session, I take a shower. I scrub vigorously. My tub becomes filthy with my sweat and my shame. I wish I could stay here; swallowed by the thick steam. It hides my many imperfections.

I stare in the mirror for a moment in time wishing the memories away.

The bathroom door creaks open

"Are you ok?" mom asked

"yea" I responded

I can taste the dishonesty of every syllable; but even that's a test, constantly aware of it all.

Are you ok? how are you? even what's up?

"Yes", *forced smile*

"I'm good"

"I'll be heading over to Jace's soon; I said, there was no point in hiding it...she'd find out any way she always did.

"Va-"

I cut her off before she could finish

"I'll be back soon; I promise!"

she shook her head and nodded; knowing there was no point in stopping me.

I walked past my Toyota Yaris, deciding it would be more efficient to take the bus.

After the ride over to Jace's neighborhood, I stood under the beam of the sun feeling the summer heat causing small beads of sweat under my navy hoody. I made my way over towards the rows of houses of similar build skipping past the house with the 'sold' sign' and heading over to a modest home at the end of the street near a rose bush. I quickly knocked on the burnt orange door.

Jace's mom opened the door. giving her a small smile I headed upstairs to Jace's room.

Jace wrapped his arms around me giving me a warm reassuring kiss on my cheek. Lifting me up easily we went over to the recliner near the small tv; we held on to each other.

"Vanilla..." Jace asked softly; I pretended to have fallen asleep but Jace tried again.

"Vanilla baby...I know you're awake"

"yea?" I finally responded

Jace placed a kiss on my head of curls.

"I'm going away for a bit-"

"you're leaving me?" I interrupted

"V-"

"No" I tried pulling out of his arms

but he held on to me tighter

"Vanilla baby please listen" Jace tried to reason with me

"F-you Jace," I said exasperatingly

I tried to pulling away again but this time Jace managed to flip me on to my back

Jace lifted my face to look up at him; he looked a mixture between being frustrated and conflicted.

"I would never leave you...I-"

"I care too much about you"

I looked up at him "you do?"

Jace shyly smiled and touched my cheeks "yea-I do"

I licked my lips "oh.."

"So where are we going?" I asked

Jace smirked shaking his head.

"I will only be for a couple of months Vanilla"

"Ok-when are we leaving?"

Jace sighed

"Vanilla...you can't come"

"But why?"..."you just said-"

"I'll be back in time for your graduation...By that time I'll have something ready for us in L.A"

"I don't need any of that Jace... I want us"

" I need to be able to give you something to look forward to Vanilla"

"I can't stay here anymore V; not after what that man did to Nico"

"and you think I can?-He was my friend too Jace," I said pushing at his chest

Jace held my hands back "I know V... I know"