Drafted.

Chapter 1. She.

I let out a long sigh. This is gonna be shitty. First day of high school. Oh wait, correction.

First day of high school, for the second time. And I'm definitely NOT looking forward to it. Maybe I should, because this is my second chance. I need to get rid of this attitude. I can't keep drowning in self pity, it isn't gonna get me anywhere is it? After all my life could have been much much worse. And trust me I know what worse is.

There are some good aspects in my life though, there have to be.

Leaving out the part where my childhood was ruined, my parents sucked at their relationship, the only reason I'm good at something like music is because I was trying to get rid of their annoying voices that echoed all day long and all night long, because well, they just couldn't stop fighting. Trust me, that isn't even a family. I'm probably the only kid out there who wishes every night that his parents get a divorce already. Hell they're much better people without each other.

But at least I'm alive. Well I shouldn't be because just a few months back I tried to kill myself. Not my finest moment.

So let's rewind back to why I'm stuck in a new school, starting out as the new kid in my sophomore year of high school. Nope it's not because Carmicheal has hotter chicks, which is a fact as proven by my best friend Nathan Radnor. He's been here since freshman while I studied in Gregory, the rival school. How are we best friends then, you ask? I know you didn't but hey I'm the one whose narrating so just go with it.

He's been my neighbor since, she left. She. Even calling her she disgusts me. Well her name is best forgotten. At least now that I'm starting my new life. She ruined my childhood and my present. I will not let her ruin me anymore. She's gone. And that's good. Very very good.

Anyway where was I? Oh yeah, why I'm here. Because I was thrown out from my previous school. Well at least they threatened to rusticate me. But my parents begged them not to. So they just 'let me go'. With a clean record. Which is a miracle considering the fact that I should be in jail right now.

Thing is, after she ruined me and left I forgot her. But then I remembered again, that's when I lost it. Lost my mind completely. I was on the verge of becoming a chain smoker and a seriously fucked up alcoholic. I'd sleep around more than I should have. God, I treated those girls like play things. But the next day, when the alcohol wore off, the uncomfortable feeling would come back. She would come back. I'd feel terrible. So I'd just leave before those girls even woke up. Let's not forgot the 10,567 or more fights that I got into. My face was almost always covered with a bruise, but the ones I fought, they'd have broken ribs so I guess my scars weren't that bad after all. In fact girls somehow found that intriguing. Why that is, is beyond my comprehension. Girls are weird. And thanks to her, I hate them. The only time I don't loathe the female population is when I'm drunk. And I've been sober since the last two months. Well I do have my slips here and there, but compared to the past I'm in a much better place. Yup.

So basically I was your typical loser bad boy. And no not the bad boy from chick flicks and cheesy novels. My bad was a whole different level. And then I got into the biggest fight of my life. With that douchebag Connor. He was the biggest bully in school and he obviously felt threatened by me because like I said, I took it to a whole new level. He was just the school jerk, but I was the schools mystery element. The guy who calls for trouble. And that's very true. Trouble was my only distraction. Intoxication my only escape. Fights my only outlet for anger, anger that's ruined me since I was 6.

But I guess it all happened for the good. I'm getting to start over. Yes I humiliated my parents and ruined myself. Let's not forgot the slashing the wrist thing. But I'm alive, I intended to be alive anyway, maybe. And no I did not self harm. What happened to me could not be fixed by a blade across my skin. I just went for the whole deal, attempted suicide. Why? Well. Life gets tough. But I'm just fucking 16, life is gonna be tougher. There's worse things that happen to people. Or maybe not. This last years taught me a lot of things, for example finding the good in bad situations. I'd read the quote 'life through rose tinted glasses ' long ago and I finally understand the meaning. No I ain't explaining because you should do your homework and research if you plan on understanding me. And that will be THE challenge.