Hayan Night

㉒You Don't Get To Do This

 
Everything was messed up, honestly.

Taehyung was stupid enough to stay mute once again and not admit how much he cared for him. He was stupid enough to not let him know that the things Namjoon said weren't true. But he was determined. He would talk to him, and if Jeongguk didn't want to listen, he would make him listen.

He waited for him to come an hour earlier as usual, but to his surprise, Jeongguk didn't show up. He even called him, but he didn't answer. And at last, he sent him a message asking if he was coming to work, and Jeongguk replied with a dry yes. He didn't know what was happening, but talking about it through texts wasn't his thing.

Fifteen minutes before the preparations would start, a knock on his door made him flinch and explode out of his seat. Hoping it was Jeongguk, he scurried to the door and yanked it open, only to be met with Jimin.

"Can we talk?"

Taehyung gave a firm nod and stepped aside to let him enter. He closed the door with a soft thud, and they settled down on the couch.

"There isn't really much to say. I'm sorry, Tae. I shouldn't have done anything. I was stupid."

"I'm not the one you should be saying sorry to."

"I should say sorry to both of you. To Jeongguk because I hurt him, and to you because... it's you. I should have known better. You clearly had your reasons to do what you did, but I didn't think about that at all. I was really pissed and I took it out on him. I just... I don't understand why you would do that."

Taehyung heaved a sigh as he glanced away. "Jeongguk is different. I mean, he's pure, he's kind, and he has been through a lot. And I screwed up his life more when I hired him. It was all nice and exciting when we found an innocent little boy who would listen to whatever we had to say and do what we wanted him to do until it wasn't." He realized how stupid his plan to hire him to keep him in check was and couldn't help but feel awful. Because at that moment, he had become like those people he loathed.

"I—I almost choked him, Jiminie. I almost choked him, and two days later, he found me beaten outside of the club and couldn't stop crying. He couldn't stop crying for me. Does this even make sense?"

"I don't know. I don't think it makes sense."

"Exactly because it doesn't. That's why I'm saying he's different. And fuck, I never cared about anyone other than you, Namjoon, and Hoseok. And I'm sorry for being so aggressive yesterday, I just saw red."

"You care about him. That's why you took the beating," Jimin said with a small voice as the dawning realization descended upon him.

"I wanted to make it up to him for putting him through all this without a reason at all."

"Shit, it was my idea. Not yours, Tae."

"Your idea, but I made the call. I could have said no, but I didn't. I hired him. It's all on me and I wanted to make it up to him. Now he can have a normal job and make a living without feeling disgusted or... disgusting himself."

"You care about someone else other than us." A mild smile sprawled on his lips. "What happened to you?"

"I really don't have any answers. But I think... I think I feel something... for him."

"What? You don't do feelings!"

"Don't you think I know that?" he hissed at him with a scowl. "That's why I said I don't have any answers. Because I don't know what this is, I don't know what I'm feeling, but I know I'm feeling something. It's really messed up, Jiminie." He ran a hand through his hair, frustrated with all the unfamiliar feelings he experienced. "Look, no one knows about this, and I only told you so you can understand why I did what I did. And I'm really sorry for the way I acted."