Now You See Me [Jasper Hale story]

XVII. New Beginnings, New Habits

"It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend." -William Blake

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Weeks passed by surprisingly quickly. Unlike Bella, I hadn't spent days wandering through school and afternoons sitting by the window, looking for the previous day. I thought my body and mind thrived, focusing on my studies, instead of on how hot Hale looked. I had even started going jogging every morning, for as much as I couldn't sleep well lately. I was very much aware of the blonde-haired, golden eyed, hot-looking reason of my insomnia, yet, I wasn't going to admit that I missed him to myself any time soon. Angela was doing her best to replace the best friend (Alice) in my life, after the Cullens left the town. I knew it and appreciated her effort very much. Alice was Alice though. Even though I hated myself for missing her so much, as well as I missed Emmett and others. Besides Rosalie, of course. Usually, a couple of memories of her acid grimace helped me to partly forget about the empty space in my soul.

As every morning, I ran out of the house, onto the pavement that connected the suburbs (where our house was situated) with the "city center". The track was bare three miles long, however, for someone like me - who preferred watching athletes running one and only on the TV screen - it was far enough. In the middle of it, moreover, there was a coffee shop, which I stopped in every morning. It was kind of my daily ritual; I bought a coffee for both me and my aunt, got it packed in a special bag, paid around four bucks, thanked the waiters politely, and got on the way back home.
This whole sporting activity of mine took an hour. Once I got home, I was usually the only person awake, since Hayden was a great sleeper. If there wasn't an emergency from the hospital, I wouldn't get her out of the bed either with a jack hammer.
After I came back home, I put the coffees on the kitchen counter, and ran upstairs, to take a cold shower. You see - another thing that I decided to change in my life. Doctors said it was healthy to take cold showers in the morning, so there, I started doing so.

When I came back downstairs, all fresh and dressed, Hayden was awake already. She had been sitting at the dining table, playing with her cup of coffee absentmindedly, looking into nothing with sleepy eyes. Her poor condition at seven o'clock hadn't been anything unusual, for that, I just passed around her, mumbling my quiet "m'rning."

"Morning, Honey," she smiled at me, the moment she noticed me, "Did you go jogging again?"

I ayed her, and she huffed. "Oh my brave, sporty girl! I can't wait to see you on the TV next summer! Did you choose United States or Ireland to run for?"

I chuckled. My aunt regarded summer Olympic Games and I knew she wasn't sarcastic. Hayden never really did any sport, that was why she appreciated and supported all of my athletic tendencies.

"Ireland!" I stated proudly, "She is in love with the ocean, the Earth and the skies. She is enamoured with a beauty - wherever it lays. She's a victor, she's a victim, a star and a clod..."

"But mostly she's Irish, in love with her God." She completed the words of most accurate Irish poem I had started recitating. Hayden then lifted the corners of her lips softly; soon though, her eyebrows furrowed worriedly. We both went silent, for how much we missed Ireland; my aunt moreover started playing with her cup again.

"What do ya want for breakfast, Hayd?" I broke the silence, putting the bowl of cereals on the dining table.

My aunt just blinked at me for a few times. As if I had dragged her from some peculiar riddle she had been solving in her head, "Uhm... give me the roll from yesterday."

I lifted my eyebrow, "Is that all you'll eat?"

"What can I say? Your cereals make me nervous," she stated unhappily.

I supressed a grin, as I rolled my eyes and opened the fridge, "Alright... I was going to put some ham and cheese on the roll anyways."

As I put the plate in front of her, she waited for me to sit down and we started eating. Hayden opened the newspaper, taking the financial, economical and regional part out of it. She handed me world news, culture, lifestyle and sports, as always. We were done eating soon, still though, there was a good half an hour left, until my aunt would have to leave for work.

"Gwyn, can we talk?" Hayden asked suddenly, taking my bowl, putting it into the dishwasher. I had been planning to go upstairs to finish the homework for History, but having a conversation with my aunt was more interesting. I may have as well been going to get some more information on why she decided to move us over the Atlantic ocean.

"Umm... sure," I sat back down, looking at her in expectation, "wait, am I in trouble?"

"No, you're not," her words calmed me down; the serious expression of her face made the exact opposite though. "Honey, you know how much I admire the great change of your lifestyle. Your will to wake up two hours earlier every morning is really inspiring, not to mention the kilograms you have lost during last two months. But..." she paused indecisively.

"But?" I raised my eyebrows.

Hayden bit on her lower lip, stretching her arm over the table, to caress the back of my palm gently. "But I think you should slow down a bit. Never in your life were you as skinny as you have been lately. Your jeans are barely hanging on you, all the T-shirts you love are two sizes bigger."

"So?" I snatched my hand away. It was too violent thing to do, as I soon realized, thanks to my aunt's slightly hurt look, "I'm just trying to live more healthily. And I feel really good!"

"Are you sure?" Her eyes pierced through mine suddenly. I- unprepared for such an amount of suspicion - looked away in an instant. "Because you're far paler than you used to be; and the bags under your eyes are highly visible." I breathed in to argue with her, however, she was faster. "Sweetie, I know how much you miss your friend, Alice. Why don't you call her, or write an email to her though? She will surely be glad to hear from you!"

"Alice is gone," I announced as serenely as possible, "she and her family will never come back to Forks again. There's no reason for me to try to connect with her, or any other member of her family."

Hayden looked at me pityingly, "I'm sorry, Honey. Is there anything I can do for you?"

"No, I'm fine, Hayden," I lied swiftly. No matter how much I wanted my words to be true, the complete truth was, that I noticed the changes on my body structure as well. So far though, they were more positive than negative and that was why I decided not to preoccupy myself with the weight-loss too much. A few things of my closet still fitted me just fine, therefore, I had no reason to be worried.
"I've got to go to school now. I'm going to the Clearwater's in the afternoon, to tutor Seth, but I promise I'll call you when I get home tonight, alright?"

"Alright..." Hayden exhaled resignedly. She hadn't stopped peeping at me worriedly nevertheless. I took my bag and got out of the house as fast as I could. The last thing I needed, after all, was my aunt, giving me a lecture on how to live my own life.


After I parked my Golf on its usual place, in front of the stump that was left of the elm tree, I turned around to enter the building. The fate was never very kind to me though, standing the small figure of Bella Swan right in my way. You remember when my aunt said there were visible bags under my eyes? The moment I saw Bella, I wished for Hayden to take a look at her, to see that the bags under my eyes could have looked far worse.

"Uhm... hey there," I greeted her, coming up with a false, polite smile. The two of us never spoke to each other much. Well, the first month after the Cullens left, Bella hadn't been speaking to anyone; approximately two weeks ago, she started seeing some Indian guy from the La Push, and she started socializing again.

"Hello," she answered briefly, attempting to smile at me as well, but failing completely, "I just... came to ask you how you're doing, Gwyn. Don't worry, I won't disturb you for much longer."

"Well, I'm fine, thank you for asking," I stated firmly, "And you don't disturb me, Bella. In fact, I've wanted to talk to you earlier, but... you seemed somewhat closed up in your own bubble."

Bella grimaced, while I noticed a gash on the left side of her forehead for the first time. "Oh my god, what happened to you?" I frowned at her wound curiously.

Bella touched her forehead hesitantly, "Oh... that's nothing. I fell off of motorbike and-"

"What?!" I exclaimed, my eyes widening, "Falling off of a motorbike is nothing, according to you?! Bella, you could have gotten seriously hurt! Were you at hospital? Did doctors take a look at you? God, I didn't even know you had a motorbike!"

Under the flood of my questions and reproaching, Bella blinked for a few times. In front of my damned eyes, a memory of Alice, telling me to keep an eye on Swan, rose and I couldn't help myself but assumed I failed her. A small, logical part of my brain called out that I didn't owe anything to Alice, and that Cullen shouldn't have left in the first place, if she had wanted to keep Bella safe.

"I wasn't at hospital, it's just a scratch; Billy Black - my dad's friend - fixed it with a patch." Bella said calmly, "I rescued the motorbike from the scrap a few weeks ago, then asked my friend to fix it. I-I only wanted to feel some adrenaline, you know? To hear the rush of air in my ears again. For the first time, since..."

"They left," I finished for her, sighing. Taking a longer pause, I tossed my head in the direction of the school building, as I started leading the way slowly. Bella caught up with me immediately. "Look, Honey, I know I'm probably not the right person to advice you in this, because I have hands full of work with fixing my own life lately. But I miss the Cullens too," it almost hurt me to say so, "I can imagine that what you and that ginger pain in ass had, must have been amazing. However, don't you think he screwed this up? Leaving you behind like a piece of trash, escaping from here as an utter coward?"

Those were the sentences I had been repeating to myself, in order to sicken my own view of Jasper Hale. It wasn't genuinely helpful, but I liked to think of him as of a treacherous bastard rather than a hot guy whom I had started to like. Really. Thinking that way, the world around felt easier and better, while my newest goal was to make Bella feel better.

"Hey guys!" A high-pitched voice of Jessica Stanley's pierced through our eardrums, as both Bella and I looked up, to see the girl smiling at us.

"Hey Jess," Bella murmured quietly and I turned around to look behind us. It wasn't common for Stanley to smile at people like me and Swan, for that, I assumed some hot guy must have been standing behind us. And I was right. Mike Newton - Bella's classmate, the friend of Eric's and Angela's - was approaching us slowly, smiling smugly at us.

"So, are you two going to class? Bells, we have History together. Will you help me with the homework?" Jessica ran down the stairs, pretending not to have noticed Mike. Nevertheless, she shook her hips evidently, meanwhile doing so, which meant she was trying to get his attention to herself. Bella and I exchanged amused glances (more amused in my case, less amused in Bella's), as Ms. Swan nodded in agreement.

I waited for a few more minutes, since alongside Mike Newton, Angela with Eric had been making their way towards me. Together, we left for our first lesson.