Awkward Encouter: A Dan Howell Story

Chapter 1

Yaaawwwn. Autumn sat up in her floral blankets and stretched. Her dark brown sugar hair was all over the place; she looked into the mirror on the wall and decided she looked a bit like medusa. “Well another day in the life of me.” She thought as she walked zombie-like to the door. She grabbed her robe and slipped on her soft slippers. As she came entered the living room and passed it into the kitchen she switched the television on.                                                                       

“Youtube sensations Dan Howell and Phil Lester, more widely known as danisnotonfire and amazingphil are in Chicago. A source tells us that they are here on vacation, or “holiday as the English say…” the woman on the screen stopped to laugh at her own horrible joke and then continued “So much for getting rest. Everywhere they go, they are seeming to be recognized. Maybe American girls are a bit crazier than girls across the pond….”

I clicked the button and the screen went black. I love Dan and Phil, especially Dan, but that news reporter was driving me up the wall with her terrible puns. I sipped at my coffee and then my eyes widened. “Dan and Phil are in Chicago….I live in Chicago…I can meet them!” I jumped up with excitement and spilled my coffee all over the floor. My dog, Pickle, was happy to clean up the mess. My perfect little yorkie was at the puddle of coffee in less than a second. I smiled and pat his head. “goodboy.”                                   I stood up still excited and then I realized. “I couldn’t meet them. I have a meeting today.” My heart and spirits sank. Oh well hopefully they stay longer than just today, that would be a short holiday anyway. “Oh god,” I thought “I’m starting to say holiday like the news reporter.” That better not stick I warned myself.                                                                                        4 hours later

Autumn whistled for a taxi to stop and she managed to hail three taxis. All of them rolled down their window to get a better look at her. She quickly ran to the closest taxi, she hated being looked at. She always felt insecure. She wasn’t bad looking, not at all. She was gorgeous and she knew it but she couldn’t help but always feel like she was still inferior. “Helloooo gorgeous!” The taxi driver said. Autumn looked into the rearview mirror with her malt colored eyes. “WOW! Pretty eyes to match!” Autumn laughed a little and muttered a thank you, then gave him the address to Universal Design, the company she worked at. She came only a couple months ago as an intern but the boss, Marya, loved her designs. She hired Autumn on the spot.                              

The cab pulled up to the curb and Autumn got out. The cabbie kept smiling at her and gave her his number. “Oh-uh- thank you.” She awkwardly accepted the torn piece of paper. He drove of fast and Autumn turned around. “Wait….wait….no!” Autumn threw her hands up in frustration. This was the wrong address. She was blocks from where she should be. She would have to walk. She glared down at her only pair of hand-me-down Louis Vuittons. Autumn sighed internally and looked across the street. Starbucks. She could do for a latte, she would have to call Teresa, who worked at the front desk, and tell her that she was going to be late.                                    

Autumn waited for the light to change to a person walking so she could cross. The phone rang and then she heard a click, then a squeaky “Hello! This is Universal Design what can I do for you?” Teresa was never in a bad mood.                                                                                                          

  “Teresa! Hi it’s Autumn. The cabbie dropped me off blocks away from the building and traffic is intense. I’m going to be pretty late.” Autumn told her.                                                               

“Oh okay hunnie! Don’t worry I’ll tell Marya.” Teresa squeeked.                                                  

   Autumn thanked her and while she was hanging up the phone she spotted something in the alley. A man was holing another man up against a wall. “Oh no he doesn’t!” Autumn thought as she reached for her pocket knife and her pepper spray. She ran into the alley screaming to catch him by surprise. The men screamed along with her and pressed themselves up to the wall. “Get away from him you-“ She had the pepper spray about a foot from the fiends face and then she stopped. “You’re…Dan Howell. Why are you robbing this-“ she turned to look at the other man and as her eys adjusted to the darkness of the alley she could make out the features of Phil Lester. She felt like an idiot. “I’m so sorry I thought you were a criminal trying to rob this man. Oh god, I’m sorry.”

She looked down.                                                                                                         

  “Yeah, I forgive you, but would you mind getting the pepper spray out of my face.” Dan said shakily.                                                                                                                                                        Autumn hadn’t realized but her hand was frozen in front of his face. “Oh right.” She said while laughing a bit. Before she could lower the can the nozzle malfunctioned and sprayed Dan in the eyes. He screamed, then Autumn and Phil screamed.                                                                          

“Oh God! It BURNS!!” he was rubbing his eyes vigorously.                                              

      For the thousandth time Autumn apologized and then grabbed Dan’s hands. “Rubbing it will make it worse, you need to wash it out with milk. Let’s go into Starbucks I’m sure they can-“ He stopped her by putting his hand over her eyes. He couldn’t see, he was probably aiming for her mouth. “No, people will recognize us; Our hotel is near here. Let’s go there.” I looked and Phil and said “Show me the way.” He smiled and replied “Show you the way, I will.” In a slightly decent Yoda impression.

We ran to their hotel and entered the back way just in case there were crazed fans in the front. We entered their room which was quite posh. “Ahhh so you really are posh, eh Dan?” I said playfully. He laughed and then winced. The burning in his eyes was less but still pretty bad. “Phil can you get the milk?” I asked, and he nodded. His black hair swooped into his face but he scooped it back in place. He came back with a glass of milk and a towel. “I figure he could use the towel instead of trying to stick his head in the cup.” Phil was holding the towel out to me. I grabbed it and dabbed the edge into the milk. I held onto Dan’s face gently and felt his soft skin under my fingertips. He shivered but it wasn’t from the cold. I smiled and placed the soaked towel over his eyes. Milk was dripping down his face and Phil was laughing hysterically. “A dirty mind, you have.” I returned his Yoda impersonation which caused him to laugh even harder and fall off the edge of the sofa.                                                                                                                

“This is heavenly!” Dan exclaimed while holding the towel over his eyes. He licked the milk away from around his mouth and I watched intently. “Stop being creepy Autumn, he can’t see you but that doesn’t mean a thing.” I mentally admonished myself and turned the other way. I met Phil’s eyes. He raised his eyebrows in suggestive way and I blushed. I was caught. I laughed and asked Dan if he was feeling better.                                                                                 

     “Yes, thank you; Even though you were the one who sprayed me in the first place.” He laughed and lifted the towel off of his left eye so he could see me. He teased a smile at the corner of his mouth. “I didn’t mean to spray you! The pepper spray malfunctioned I swear.” I was defensive but I was laughing. “I really am sorry.” I said.

Dan looked up at me, seeming to forget his eyes were in pain, and winked. I blushed and stood up. “I should be leaving actually; I was already late for work when I stopped you from robbing Phil.” I winked back at him.